MY FATHER'S PAINTSHOP...
BY GLORIA FAYE BROWN BATES aka GRANNY GEE
I walked quietly by the doorway quickly peeping inside to ... just see! How exciting it was to get a glimpse of something so special... it stayed in my mind ... forever! How I wished with my heart to be invited in, asked to join my father in whatever project he was working on.
My father was a professional sign painter for Pepsi. He did beautiful work on his job, and for other businesses. He also, was a boilermaker. He travelled for years working.
I would walk quietly away with what I saw ....hugged tightly in my mind. When I got to where I could think about what I saw... I let my eyes see what I'd held to in my mind. I closed my eyes to 'see'... a wonderful light shining over the art table with the 'table' tilted up to make an easel. It had wonderful, blank white paper on it.
I could see the ruler laying close by, and the colors.... oh, the happy sign paint colors! I saw his brushes, his palette. Oh, how I wanted to go into my father's paint shop, and draw and paint with him. He never invited me, but, he invited my youngest sister, Peggy Lee, to come draw and learn to paint. She had talent, but, was never interested in going in there. But... I was... please invite me to come inside! He ...never did.
Many, many years later before my father died... we went to visit him. We walked to his paintshop... it was now in shambles. It was cluttered, nothing kept in order. My father had cancer, the surgery had destroyed his face.
So, the shop of colors, the exciting jars, paintbrushes, rulers, all the wonderful art supplies stayed in my mind. I would look at it in my mind treasuring my memory of it. Sometimes, I would see my dad standing there painting with his back to me, as it was to me in my 'everyday'. He never knew I stood quietly there watching him draw while wishing I was asked to come in. He never did.
My father would cut out plywood shapes and paint them. He painted in the most vivid, beautiful colors. How my hands wanted to hold one of his paintbrushes to paint, one of his pencils to draw, to use that wonderful art table under the shining light like sunshine! I wanted to use some of the colors I saw there on that table! I could draw like him, it came naturally! How I wished he would take me under his wing and teach me the things he knew... he never did.
Colors As I Go
grief (32) only child (4) Scary (2) Boiled eggs (1) Distrust (1) Don't call me Faye (1) Dying (1) I hate to be called Faye (1) I'm afraid of the dark (1) Middle age woman (1) Pain that reaches the soul.. can't be seen (1) Running (1) Where did my youth go? (1) dying in a beautiful way (1) life is fragile (1) light on my path (1) my son (1)