Let Your Character Work For You ... I'm In Control
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee ... photo is of me, owned by me. 2014
I'm not going to do it ... no matter you try to make me. Oh ... if 'I want to say that' ... I will. I can do anything ... I want to do.
I poured myself another mixed drink. The liquid felt good going down my dry throat. Pretty soon ... I copped a buzz. I felt relaxed ... sleepy. I thought about taking a nap ...
No, hell ... you don't! I want to take a nap right this minute! I can ... do anything ... say anything. That's right ... I said 'hell'. If I want to ... I can say more than just 'hell'. This is ... all about 'me', you know.
I'm not going out the damn door at this time of night! I'm relaxed, sleepy ... I've copped a mellow, wonderful ... fuzzy buzz! I choose ... not to get up from this comfortable chair ... I choose not to walk across the wooden floor to the door ... open it, go out into the pitch black night.
I'm afraid of the dark, anyway. Don't be sending me into places, situations that scare me. I'm not anyone's hero ... not even my own hero. I avoid situations that put me into danger.
Put me down, don't make me get up from this wonderful chair I'm sitting in. Don't be making me do things ... when at the moment ... I don't want to do anything! Leave me the hell alone!
I got to my feet, feeling a little unsteady. I didn't want to get up ... my feet began to walk, one foot in front of the other. Son of a ...bitch! I said I didn't want to get up!
I walked to the door, reached out for the door knob. I don't want to turn that door knob! I heard a noise ... someone could be waiting just outside the door ... to knock me in the head! I tried to take my hand off the knob ... you wouldn't let me.
The knob began to turn ... no! I know someone is outside that door ... I just heard them! I fought to lock the door back to no avail. The door opens, I feel the cold air on my face. A cold chill traveled down my spine ... I want back inside!
My feet began to carry me forward ... like I'm some brave hero. Such confidence I didn't feel inside ... I never heard it coming.
I awoke ... looked around. Where in the f___ am I?! A hospital? I see a curtain pulled around the bed I lay in. I began to remember ...
I didn't want to go outside ... I didn't want to talk ugly ... I'm not a hero. I was just fine, before this happened. By the way, what did ... you ... cause to happen to me, this time?!
The doctor walked in ... he called me by a name I didn't recognize. Hi Jasper ... looks like you are going to be with us for a while. You have two broken arms ... two broken legs ... a concussion ... we don't even know if you'll ever walk again.
I felt sick ... you really fixed my ass this time. I told you I am the one who is important here. I'm the one that makes your story. I can't understand why you just disabled me so, I can't do anything for weeks.
I don't like being quiet ... I hate to be in bed! I want to walk, run ... do things. I sat up, somehow ... making my arms help to raise me. I swing my legs over the side of the bed ... I'm going to walk out of here! My legs, my arms are working!
I put my clothes on, quickly. I'm getting the hell out of Dodge ... don't do that! Don't do that!
I awoke once again ... in that damn bed. The doctor walks in ... he calls me by a name I don't recognize. Hi Jasper ... looks like you are going to be with us for a while. You have two broken arms ... two broken legs ... a concussion ... we don't know if you'll ever walk again.
I'm not going through this again! I slung that damn sheet off my body ... my arms working good once again. I jumped to my feet ...danced from one foot to the other. I told you now, I'm not doing this! I am going to do it my way ... you can't write this story if you keep going against this character's will.
Write me the way I am ... let me be free ... don't force me! I'll be the character you want me to be. There are times ... I'm going to say what's on my mind ... do what I want to do. One of those things I'm not going to do something, is now ... be put in a damn bed for weeks to come. I'm not in the mood.
You use your pen, your imagination ... let me go to work for you. Relax ... have a mixed drink ... let's do this thing. Let your character work for you ... I'm in control.
Story is written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
Colors As I Go
grief (32) only child (4) Scary (2) Boiled eggs (1) Distrust (1) Don't call me Faye (1) Dying (1) I hate to be called Faye (1) I'm afraid of the dark (1) Middle age woman (1) Pain that reaches the soul.. can't be seen (1) Running (1) Where did my youth go? (1) dying in a beautiful way (1) life is fragile (1) light on my path (1) my son (1)