Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Look What Love, Prayers, Donations Did ... Created a Miracle

Look What Love, Prayers, Donations Did ... Created a Miracle
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/aka @GeeGranny on Twitter





















Precious Camo ... Camie




Photos are all owned by me, Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.  These are not the worst photos of Camie.  You are welcome to go to hers and Kissy's Facebook page where I am posting lots of photos this week until July 4th.         https://www.facebook.com/camocameobates           Come, be their Facebook Friends.  I update almost every day.





On July 04, 2013 ... I rescued a little puppy whose name was Camo.  She was a little girl puppy.

Someone had named her Camo ... we thought she was a boy at first.  Our special friend in Australia chose her new name ... Camie.  So, you see both Precious Camo and Camie on her Facebook page.

She was near death when I picked her up off the ground.  Maggots began falling off her body.

I brought her home not knowing how I could even begin to pay for medical care to help her.  We already had our 2 Pups and we took extra-good care of them ... because we didn't want to take a chance on one having to go to the vet.  We were making it week to week ... and it was very hard.

I had in my mind that if this little puppy died ... it wouldn't die alone, unloved.  She would be with me by her side.  In my mind, I knew one way or other ... I was going to fight for her to live.  I would beg if I had to ... to get medical care for her.

We took her to Louisburg Veterinary in Louisburg, NC (Dr. David Fontenot).  We talked to him about Camie's condition.  He said he'd never seen a worse case of demodectic mange.  He kept her overnight, did tests on her.  She was in a bad way.   Not only that, she'd been bitten by a brown tick and had canine ehrlichiosis.

People ususually have dogs put to sleep when they are this bad off.  I never thought about doing that even for the first time.

She had no hair, had been exposed to the elements and was laying on the wet, cold ground when I found her.  Her skin was oozing with clear fluid, blood ... she had no hair.  Looking at her ... broke my Heart.

I was already in the grieving process for the loss of my only child, my son ... Tommy.  My attention went to this little puppy, and I became determined to make her live ... I wanted this puppy to know how it felt to be loved, to eat good food ... to be a part of us.

Now ... this comes from a person who didn't want another dog.  For years I have been tied down to the home to make sure our Pups were loved, cared for.

I didn't go on trips, on the road with Skip.  I'm the person who dearly loves to travel.  My love for our Pups ... was most important.  So, I have missed out on many miles of traveling.  It has been worth it.

Thank God ... I have traveled a lot in my younger life ... at least I'm not afraid to go out my back door, even by myself ... drive anywhere in this country of ours.  I don't really need a map to travel by ... I know how to go.  I've traveled in the past by private vehicle ... and for 3 years on a tractor-trailer ( I drove, also!  :)  At least, I got to travel ...

I hope and pray to do it again in the future.  I'd dearly love to just have a small travel trailer to pull  (we used to have one years ago).  That way, we could go on short trips at least ... and we'd have that ... the Pups and us could go, stay long as we wanted to.

I hope we can find one by a miracle that isn't so expensive ... and in the best of shape.  Anything is possible. Not only that ... if for some reason one couldn't pay high rent always ... they have a shelter over their head.

This is honestly my way of thinking.  I wish we'd kept the one we had years ago.  It would be in good shape, because we take care of our things.  I'm straying from my subject of Camie ... :)

We would carry a portable fence, set it up as needed.  We are most protective over our Pups ... Kissy and Camie.  Our Sweet Chadwick Elsworth died on January 16, 2015 during a seizure.  Skip and our 2 Pups are my whole world ... since Tommy and Chadwick, died.  I have no one else ... I treasure Skip, Camie and Kissy.

Getting back to Camie ... Precious Camo.  She has a Facebook page where one can see all the photos I'm posting this week until July 4, 2015 ... she was rescued on July 4, 2013, two years ago.

I do this each year of her life to show her new friends what condition she was in when I rescued her ... they only see her photos now ... would never know she wasn't always like that.  Like me ... Skip (cancer survivors) ... she is lucky to be here.

The people who donate constantly to Camie's and Kissy's medical care at Louisburg Veterinary in Louisburg, NC (919-496-2638) ... people who constantly keep our Pups in their prayers ... when they look at these photos ... they can see where their hard-earned money went ... know it helped 2 precious Pups get better.  They can visit the Facebook page each day for a peep into their daily life.

Not only that ... I am forever grateful to them.  They can actually see each day what they are a part of ... what they did.  If it wasn't for them ... I can't bear to think about it.

I will put photos here on this to show you.  You are welcome to come to her Facebook page, be her friend ... see how far she has come to be here.  I update her page almost every day so, one can keep up with her and Kissy, our Rottweiler.

The link to Camie's and Kissy's Facebook page is:

https://www.facebook.com/camocameobates




Photos are owned by me ... article written, owned by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter.





Monday, June 29, 2015

I Believe in the Right to Die With Dignity ...

I Believe in the Right to Die With Dignity ...

By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter





Photo is owned by me.  The friend (Cindy) who made this for us never knew how comforting I found this light in the bottle to be. Even my photo of it ... comforts me.  Why?  Because light chases the darkness away.  I've been in darkness too much in my life.  Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter





This is another controversial subject I'm going to write about. I'm going to tell you how I feel about it.

I respect your feelings, your way of thinking on this subject.  I would never think I can tell you what to feel, think.  I will let you respect my feelings, way of thinking ... I couldn't let anyone tell me that my way of thinking is wrong.  How do you know?  How do I know?

So, before I go on ... I can see your way of thinking as well as my way of thinking.  It's just that my way of thinking 'feels right' to me inside my Heart.  These are my feelings that are ... right for me.

I have been in the position of dying ... of knowing I was going to die.  I know what it feels like to ... know ... there was no need of buying me pretty clothes ... Ty Beanie Babies for my collection ... no need of doing anything extra for me.

I knew I wouldn't live to see a future.  I didn't want money wasted on me when it could be used for more important.  This was my way of thinking when I so sick ...

If you've never been to this point in life ... being sick with a life-threatening illness ... so close to death, I can't expect you to understand.  The only way you will be able to make such a decision as I'm going to talk about ... is to go to the doorstep of Death ... if you can come back from it ... you can make a judgement.

I've been there a few times in my life.   I was dying from cancer ... non-Hodgkins lymphoma ... the suffering, tests, the time it took to find out what was wrong with me before surgeries ... took several months.  Only surgery could ... save my life.

After the surgery ... I was told I could die before I opened my eyes to see who was telling me I had cancer.  I never saw her ... I never saw the oncologist that saved my life with the aggressive treatment she used ... and others didn't understand why she chose that.  It worked ... it damaged my heart.  It was a trade-off to live.  I'll take that.

I remember I thought she was a big, tall presence.  Later, months later when I began to be aware of things ... I really looked at her, saw that she was tall but ... not big.  How did I think she was 'big'?  Because later I found out she lost a lot of weight.  Strange how I perceived her ... I never saw her clearly and was drugged up.

When I heard her booming voice ... the nurse, Skip were sitting me up in a chair in the Intensive Care Cardiac Unit ... that's the first I remember.  All I could see were tall letters in my mind when the oncologist's voice said ... C A N C E R ... in giant letters.

I'll have to describe the strange feeling, thoughts that played in my mind when I couldn't see around me ...  because of the drugs given to me, the weakened state I was in.  I kept thinking I could go back on the other side if only ... I could go back, not have cancer.

I was dying.  For some reason, I kept 'thinking I could go back to being all right if .... '

I could see an invisible line ... if I could just go back to the other side of it.  I lay in that dark world ... my mind kept trying to take me back ... to the other side of that ... invisible straight line.  Strange I know.  I'll examine that closely one day.  I've never taken time ... why does it bother me ... now?

I know now, I have lived 16 years when I shouldn't have ... not many made it.  The new oncologist told me not long ago, I shouldn't be here ... 98% didn't make it with what I had, and as sick as I was.  I was at Death's door the morning I had the first surgery to remove the huge mass off my lung ... resting on my heart.

I will have to take time to sometime, think about what if anything I have done of value during the precious sixteen years I was given.  I don't think I've done anything so special.  I should have at least been some kind of hero or something.

Anyway, dying with dignity.  This is how I really feel after making it back from the Cancer Journey in my life.

I feel if I'm at the point of dying ... know that I'm not going to live ... laying in agony ... or becoming a 'vegetable' ... I should have the option to end my life while I'm aware.  I feel I should be able to say my goodbyes if by that time ... I have anyone to say goodbye to.

No one knows it ... I had my option to let go of life ... if I knew with certainty I was dying, no chance of living.

I knew I wasn't going to live ... I was preparing.  The thing is ... strange thing is ... something kicked in (I do think it was that infamous fighting spirit I have :).

When it kicked in ... I began seeing in my mind ... the future.  The future where I could see me doing things once again.  It was like putting a colorful toy just out of reach ... to encourage a child to learn to walk.  If he wants it bad enough ... well, you know the rest.

When that happened, I began forcing myself to sit up (oh God, I could never tell you the horrible pain I had in my chest ... get a thoracotomy ... you will always know.  I had two thoracotomies exactly one year apart ... I have 'forever pain' you wouldn't believe).

Anyway, no matter the horrible pain ... I couldn't see straight for the powerful medicines I was given ... I made my body raise up, stand up, hold onto things to walk.

I could barely walk ... and go only a few steps.  Tears ran down my face, I couldn't breathe for crying ... I kept doing this for many months.

I had become determined to live.  I wanted to live ... I wasn't accepting death without one hell of a fight.  When I did these things ... I would fall into bed ... in agonizing pain.  No matter, I meant to get strong.

No one can ever know the agony I was in ... I was alone while Skip was working as a fleet manager in a produce company.  I tried to be strong when he came home so, he could go to work, know I was all right.

Not only that ... if he even thought I was suffering ... he would become very upset.  So, many times I have to say ... I fooled Skip into thinking I was so tough, strong ... we have to do what we got to do.

That wasn't a bad way to fool someone ... at least in my situation.  It did make me personally stronger, and I made it.  It gave him comfort ... he just knew I was still me ... and I could do what I said.

After 3 years of fighting the toughest battle of my life ... I made it in time to go with Skip to the doctor, then ... oncologist ... to be there when he was diagnosed with ... colon cancer.

Skip had been caring for me, working his ass off ... and he was ... dying with colon cancer that had begun coming through his colon.

I'll never forget what I said to him at the moment he went into shock.  I said, "Skip ... that must be the reason I lived ... so, you could see that you can make it.  I'll take care of you just like you did me".

I will say this ... when I became aware of Skip being sick ... something wrong ... was during the time I was very ill.  I couldn't make decisions for myself at that time ... had to hold onto things to walk.  My body was in bad shape ... I was on powerful medicines.

Skip came to me during that time, told me that he'd been bleeding.  When he'd 'go' to the bathroom ... the commode would be filled with blood.  You know how sick I must have been when I couldn't jump up from there ... make him get to a doctor.  I wanted to ... but, the state of mind when one is very ill ... you aren't yourself.

One day, I raised up out of bed after Skip told me he wished I could see all the blood.  I meant to see it ... I knew deep down something was wrong.  Skip had been suffering with terrible cramps in his legs.  Ripping cramps up the inside of his legs.  This had been going on for months.

I made Skip help me to go see ... my knees buckled under me, he grabbed me.  I began crying ... I knew then ... Skip had colon cancer.  The damn crazy thing here is ... I 'knew' ... but, being so sick I couldn't keep it in my mind ... I couldn't make him go to the doctor ... I couldn't help myself.  Months went by ...

This is what happened as time went by ... I had something in my mind that 'made me' know I was going to get well to do.  I meant for Skip to go to a doctor.  I knew ... he was very sick.  Skip ... like me ... is strong ... has a fighting spirit that matches mine ... maybe stronger.

I know our neighbors heard me crying through the walls of our home at that time.  They just didn't know that I was beginning to force myself to do things in the house again.  I had a purpose ....

I made myself hold a broom ... my hands had forgotten what a broom felt like.  So hard, splintery.  I made myself put clothes in the washer.  I began to mop ... sure the area was very small ... it was a beginning.  I burned my hands as I stood at the stove staring at the eye on top ... it was hot.

Somehow I had forgotten ... like a child, I didn't think about it burning me ... isn't that amazing?  I took something out of the oven ... letting my hand touch the top ... I learned from that burn ... not to touch hot things.  Now ... I knew that ... but, forgot everything during my illness.  I am amazed when I think back.

I began to do little things ... in my mind ... I could see me in my future being strong, well again.  I knew I wouldn't be letting myself die ... with dignity.  I knew I was going to live.

You have to know that knowing I could decide what I wanted to do ... if ... I was going to die ... gave me comfort.  I needed that comfort ... I didn't want to live not having quality of life, someone having to care for me.  So, no matter what anyone thinks ... that's the way I felt ... still feel.  I won't argue it with anyone.

A person who has never experienced this ... can talk all they want to.  Put their ass in the same situation ... see what they do.  It's funny how things change when the person who talks loudest ... experiences pain, agony, near death.  You find out what you are made of.  You find out ... that your whole perspective changes on life, death.  You find out ... you know nothing.

So ... those who run their mouth about this or that ... don't really know anything ... maybe they'll get to know firsthand ... then, we can see what they think.

It's like in my situation being a grieving mother ... I lost my only child ... having listened to people who 'knew it all' about losing a child ... find out they don't know a damn thing ... they don't know how it feels to have their own child ... die.  Some people ... hadn't ever had a child ... go figure.

Until people can walk on those roads in life ... they can only 'guess' at what they would do.  I promise you ... they won't do all these things they so loudly say they will do when ... tragedy strikes.  I promise you that.  It would be good if they kept their mouths shut ... not make an ass of themselves.

They do not know a damn thing.  Admit it ... just say I think I would try to do this or that.  Not 'if my child dies I know I'll do this, I know I'll do that'.  Like I said ... you don't know a damn thing.

I don't even listen anymore to people ... like you.  It's probably best for you to tell someone who has a weaker mind than I do ... I don't want to hear it.

Why ... would I listen ... to you  ...tell me something you've never had to deal with in your life?  You'd be like a teacher trying to teach ... never having an education ... not a foot to stand on.

It's like someone telling you how to drive ... never driving in their life.  It's a whole different ballgame ...

Anyway ... unless one knows from experience ... it would pay to tread lightly when saying things around people ... who have survived trauma, tragedy ... bad things in their life.  You don't want to make these people ... teach you a thing or two.  You really don't have to say a thing excepting ... I care, I'm so sorry.

This is some ... I never said it's all I think on the subject of death ... of what I think about dying with dignity.  In my case after experiencing what I have with near-death ...  it's for me.  I believe in it.  I believe in hospice ... keeping someone from suffering.

I believe in my case, my life ... I would want to have a tablet to take when it came time that I knew I couldn't come back from my illness.  I can't speak for you ... only for myself.

I believe in the right to die with dignity.




Note by this Author:  Photos/my thoughts on this subject are both owned, written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter.







 




Not Enough of ... Me

Not Enough of ... Me
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter



Photos/story owned, written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter





I slowed down as my eyes spotted something on the road up in front of me.  Is it a turtle?  A big turtle!  I felt my heart jump in my throat.

Big turtles scare me ... but, my nature is to protect something innocent ... even if I'm afraid.  They can really hurt one if they can bite you.  The sounds are also, intimidating!  I know.  I have moved quite a few turtles from the roadway in my life.

I always put them to the side of the road they were traveling ... toward.  They know best where they are going ... or they wouldn't be pointed that way when I discovered them.

A turtle doesn't know how much I care that he gets hit by a car.  He is still going into fighting mode.
I have to take a deep breath, tell that turtle ... 'I'm going to save you whether you know it or not'.

If it's big, I watch my face so, it won't bite my nose!  I'm short!  :)  I try to figure out best how to place my hands ... no matter, I'm still afraid.  One way or other, I'm going to save the turtle's life.

It's strange ... I am protective of animals, people by nature.  I would even protect an alligator from getting hit by a car.  How?  I am always improvising ... that is my nature, also.  I would figure out a way, even it took some time to think about it.  I don't have a definite plan ... I've never had to save an alligator!

Sometimes ... this is the bad thing ... I have to accept there are going to be times ... when circumstances will prevent me from being able to ... save.

See, I always knew as a little girl that I would grow up to save the world.  Have you ever heard of me?  I didn't think so.  I didn't grow up to save anything ... excepting some animals, turtles ... and truly, a life or two.  I have saved a fish or two ... insects, spiders (even though I don't like some of them).

No, I didn't save the world ... I found out there wasn't enough of me.

Sunday, June 28, 2015

YOU ARE EATING FACEBOOK POTATO CHIPS ON MY FACEBOOK COUCH ... MAKING A MESS IN MY FACEBOOK HOME

YOU ARE EATING FACEBOOK POTATO CHIPS ON MY FACEBOOK COUCH ... MAKING A MESS IN MY FACEBOOK HOME
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter





Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter




We all have them ... they never speak to us ... never acknowledge us ... yet, they requested to be our 'friends' on Facebook.  But ... THEY ARE ALWAYS THERE.

Sometimes, we do the same thing when we request, and are accepted as a ... Facebook Friend.  We go on about our lives ... we know it's alright not to speak ... it's just nice to be friends.  We can speak anytime ... when we do ... it's special.

WE DON'T LEAVE BAD FEELINGS ON SOMEONE'S FACEBOOK WHILE WE SIT THERE SAYING, DOING ... NOTHING.  Admit it ... everytime you see certain names ... you wonder WHY THE HELL do you let them sit there IN YOUR WORLD?

Isn't it a wonderful thing when someone sees your name there ... and they are glad you are their Facebook Friend?  I like that.  The friends that I don't know personally are people I met online ... I liked them very much.  They made a good impression on me.

There was always something good about them that made me want to choose them to be my Facebook Friends.  I love good people ... if I ever let you be on my Facebook ... feel honored.  I truly, really wanted to let you into my FACEBOOK HOME ... I look forward to you being there.

Feel honored also ... if I take you off.  Why?  It saves you and I both face ... neither of us has to say anything ... to hurt the other's feelings.  It simply means you made a mistake in coming into my FACEBOOK HOME for whatever your reasons are.  It simply means I ... have to let you go for my own mental health.

We can go our way, if we ever meet ... we can smile, greet ... pass and re-pass peacefully.  I know you don't like me ... you know I don't like you.  We could like each other, not know what to say to the other ... that's sad.

But ... always remember this ... I LET YOU come into MY Facebook World by accepting you ... hoping you would make me feel happy for you being in it.

You don't always have to say anything ... once in a while ... just speak.  Hell ... I just let you come into my Facebook Home ... I didn't have to do that.  YOU ARE SITTING THERE ON MY FACEBOOK COUCH ... just as if in my home.  .

Would you come into my home ... sit on your ass on my couch ... not speak to me?  Would you sit there while I went about my every day ... trying to pretend to be invisible ... thinking I don't notice you?

All in trying to learn my life, know all about me ... not let know you are there?

I got a secret for you ... I'm most aware of you ... because nobody acts like you do.  Especially when I've known you through the years ... and I accept you in my world ... you go your way trying to pretend you aren't there.  I let you in because I hoped to be glad I did.

Sometimes ... the past can be mended if there was ever bad feelings.  Sometimes, people can come closer.

I am talking here about people I ... have known for years.  Hell, we may be related.  Doesn't matter ... YOU know who YOU are.

I know you are there ... every day of my life.  YOU ARE SITTING IN MY FACEBOOK HOME ON MY FACEBOOK COUCH ... AND TRYING TO BE INVISIBLE.

YOU WANT TO WATCH MY LIFE, NOT SHARE YOURS ... I KNOW YOU ARE THERE.

HEY ... I REALLY KNOW YOU ARE THERE.  MY MIND STAYS ON YOU.  IF YOU DON'T SPEAK ... HOW DO I KNOW YOU DON'T MEAN ME BAD THINGS IN MY LIFE?  HOW DO I KNOW YOU ARE THERE IN A GOOD WAY?

My wish is ... you take yourself off my Facebook page, save face ... if you aren't there in a good way.  Do it ... yesterday.  Do it ... now.

My wish is ... for you to stay out of my life just as I do yours ... if you aren't a sincere person.  You don't need me ... I don't need you.  You sure don't like me ... guess what?  The feeling is mutual ... I don't like you.

If I take you off my Facebook page ... don't let it bother you.  You know you SHOULDN'T BE THERE in the first place.

How many people have I watched ... on Facebook ... get upset, try to voice how they feel about this?  They didn't know how to say it ... because they don't want to appear to be ugly ... they didn't want to hurt someone.

THOSE SOMEONES ... take advantage of that to STAY IN YOUR FACEBOOK HOUSE TO BE ON THE FRONT ROW TO ... WATCH YOUR LIFE.  They know you don't want to hurt their feelings ... they know it's hard for you to decide to take their asses off your Facebook Friend List.  They know ... you won't.

Well, guess what?  If you see your name taken off my Facebook Friends in the future ... don't let it make you feel bad.  If you are sincere ... you will send another request to be for-real Facebook Friends.  I will accept you and be glad to.

If you don't send another friend request ... it gives you that chance to go on your way ... no one is hurt or ... has to feel bad.  Go on ... fly away into your own life ... fly to bigger, better things ... people.  I am only myself ... you don't need me to spy on.

See ... we all know WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE ON OUR FACEBOOKS.

I can sit here and write my list of WHO I have my mind on ... and will be watching for the next week.  Either they speak to me, let me know they are here in a good way ... or ... they will will definitely go on their on way ... with a REMOVE FACEBOOK FRIEND NUDGE right out that FACEBOOK DOOR.

GOOD PEOPLE DON'T MIND SPEAKING OUT WHEN THEY DON'T HAVE A HIDDEN AGENDA.  Good people who care about you will ... let you know it ... all feels good.

I try to select my Facebook Friends for different reasons.  To be honest ... I have lots of 'good' friends I chose years ago.  We know each other's there ... but, we don't have to say anything ... because we KNOW WE ARE THERE IN A GOOD WAY.  The special thing here is ... we know IF WE DO SPEAK ... IT'S IMPORTANT ... IT'S SPECIAL.

I love dog people ... I love animal people ... I love people who care about the less fortunate, homeless people, animals.  I love all kinds of people.

Birds of a feather ... people judge us by the friends we have.  The strange thing is ... no one can judge me by the friends I have ... all of them 'are birds of a different feather'.  I love that I have unusual friends from different walks of life.  I don't like just one flavor of ... ice cream.

Going back to this ... what about those friends who send you a friend request on your Facebook ... that know you?  Never speak to you?  Never acknowledge you once you go to the FACEBOOK DOOR ... OPEN IT, LET THEM COME IN ... YOU ARE WELCOMING THEM INTO YOUR FACEBOOK WORLD?

Do you ever wonder why?  I think about them all the time ... I am sensing them all the time on my Facebook ... I am always aware of them without them knowing it.

I AM THINKING ABOUT THE GOOD FEELINGS I HAD ... WHEN I ANSWERED MY FACEBOOK DOOR ... WELCOMED THEM INTO MY WORLD.  THEN ... THEY COME IN LIKE A GHOST TO FLOAT, HANG AROUND ... NEVER SPEAKING.  WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?

Did they hope I'd let them in ... go on to forget about them ... not know they are roaming through my FACEBOOK BEDROOM, looking at my personal things.  Make themselves at home in my PHOTOS Room while stealing my photos, seeing all they can see?

I know you are there.  I KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN THERE, WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING.  THAT'S ROBBING ME WHILE YOU VISIT ME ... HOPING I FORGOT YOU WERE IN MY HOME.  Hell, I don't need enemies ... I got you!  Come on in here ... rob my ass!

Yes, as long as I have a Facebook page, you have a Facebook page ... that's YOUR FACEBOOK HOME online.  I see now ... why I have seen many people become upset ... I have been seeing a lot of things going on ... when certain Facebook Friends stay in my FACEBOOK HOME ... thinking I don't know they are there.

Have you seen people who want to know about you, your life ... go register for a FACEBOOK page ... make up a name, throw a photo on it of a handsome man, woman?

Well ... there are ways you check into that ... find out out they had an ulterior motive for doing that.  They aren't there to be your friend ... they are dishonest and I won't go on to say more ... they are bad people.  Maybe good people in their life ... but, 'bad' ... when it comes to your life.

Maybe they don't say things to you because they are afraid to ... or they don't know what to say.  Maybe ... they just want to be quiet friends and share your life without interfering in it.  Maybe some of them ... don't like you, want to be in a position to know what you are doing.

Whatever reason ... just know this ... in the next few weeks I am going to take off several people on my Facebook .... I'm going to escort the ones who are in my FACEBOOK HOME ... who don't speak to me ... I'm going to nudge them out the FACEBOOK DOOR.

So, if you are one of those people ... just know you don't have to take it personally.  I'm helping you and helping myself.  Mentally ... it isn't good for either of us ... always having to wonder.

You have to always wonder if ... 'I can see what you are doing, taking from my Facebook' ... I have to wonder, always checking behind you to see if you are a good FACEBOOK FRIEND.

Maybe if you feel the same way I do about your FACEBOOK FRIENDS ... and you want to tell them the same thing as I'm doing now ... feel free to share my article with them.  I give you permission.  I wrote this because I've had these feelings ... and watching others become upset over the same thing.  I'm giving voices to everyone's concerns ... my concerns.

I am going to take certain people off my Facebook page ... help them out my FACEBOOK DOOR OUT OF MY FACEBOOK HOME during the next several weeks.

These are people who already know me, may be related ... and several others that don't make me feel good while they are in my FACEBOOK HOME.

I may be helping some out the Facebook Door making a mistake by misjudging ... it would mean a lot if you told me I made a mistake ... I would welcome you back into my FACEBOOK HOME.

If you don't do this ... we both know you were here not in a good way.  I wish you good in just going on your way ... don't come back to visit.  Don't waste my time.

Also ... if you feel you don't want me on your FACEBOOK FRIENDS ... please take me off.  I know it works two ways ... this is the time to do it.  No one has to feel bad, hesitant to go remove the other.

Just know this ... I am a sincere Facebook Friend ... even if I'm not saying anything.  I have too much to write, draw, do, care for our Pups, live ... to waste my time in coming to your Facebook Home to spy. I have a life.  I see what's on my Newsfeed ... there, I will sometimes comment or like.  I'm not a bad ... Facebook Friend.

So ... for the FACEBOOK FRIENDS WHO AREN'T REALLY FRIENDS AT ALL ...

IT'S TIME FOR ME TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE MY FACEBOOK HOME ... YOU HAVE WORN YOUR WELCOME OUT IN MY ONLINE HOME.





Note by this Author:  I have watched, studied the past several years on my FACEBOOK HOME.  I know everything that's been going on it ... I haven't said anything.  NOW ... it's a different story.  Why?

Because I think people have a lot of nerve ... and they do ... to come to your home, knock on your door, ask to come in to visit ... never speak, never do anything but, watch your every online move.

They sit on your FACEBOOK COUCH eating FACEBOOK POTATO CHIPS propped up on FACEBOOK PILLOWS watching your world like a giant FACEBOOK FLAT-SCREEN TV.

They sit there letting pieces of their potato chips fall on your FACEBOOK CARPET that leave a trail directly to everywhere they sneak around in your FACEBOOK HOME.  They hope you won't notice their mess.

What's so bad is when they leave a mess ... in your FACEBOOK BATHROOM ... never flushing their ugliness away.

One day you come in ... sick of it all ... you say 'it's damn time to clean, rearrange my FACEBOOK HOUSE'.

Photos/ article are both owned, written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter



Friday, June 26, 2015

Confederate Flag ... ISIS ... Lesbian-Gay ... Color ... Religion

Confederate Flag ... ISIS ... Lesbian-Gay ... Color ... Religion
 By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee



Photo is of me, owned by me.  Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee ... sometimes, I'm at a lost at what to think about the things happening in this world.  I know there is too much 'bad' ....





The Confederate flag ... ISIS ... Lesbian-Gay ... Religion ...  Color.   I've noticed that when I began to write about either subject ... I just couldn't.  I couldn't write, begin to even voice what I think, feel about all.

These are battlefields I choose not to go on ... I pick my wars ... which means I don't choose a war unless I'm going to win it, or believe in it so strongly that I would even dare think about debating it.  Some things are too sensitive ... these topics are.

The only way I'm going to argue something is when it's in good fun ... no ugliness involved.  I don't like ugly scenes, nor ... ugly people.  I don't like shallow, narrow-minded people who argue for the sake of arguing.

I've tried to give my thoughts on these subjects ... words.  I've sat, typed many words only to delete them.  Why?

Because ... I'm not going to argue what I think about anything.  How do I know I'm right?  How do I know ... you are right?  How do I know what to think?  I can only feel what I think ... feel is right.

Just like you ...  it doesn't mean I am right, no more than it means ... you are right.  We both feel we are right in thinking the way we do ... until someone comes along, shows us differently.  I'm big enough ... open-minded enough to change my way of thinking ... are you?

I have too much respect for others, their feelings ... thoughts to argue with them.  Like me, they know fully what they think, believe.  Who am I to tell them differently?  I feel if someone wants to constantly argue in a bad way... they have a love to tear down their fellow human beings.

If you think about it and you are honest about it ... you know there is more than one way to look at, think about things.  Nothing is really ... just one way.  Think about it.

We all are in this world ... no two people are the same.  When we are good people ... does it matter what color we are?  Does it matter what we believe as long as what we believe in ... is good?

Does it really matter when only good is directing us in life toward the same things.  We all just take different paths toward the ... same thing.  We call those things by different names, depending what we grew up believing.

The goal is the same ... to be good as good as we can as people ... to help others along the way ... love one another.  What more is there for ... people to do?

What does matter is ... when ugly people get out of control with their vicious, ugly, evil thoughts, deeds.  When they hurt others without caring that they made someone hurt, lay dying ... bleeding to death.  When they are out to kill many people.  Murderers, mass murderers ... people who have no heart.

Does it matter when someone shows you kindness, mercy, love at a time you need it most ... what color they are ... what their sexual preference is ... what God they believe in?  Does it?  No.  A big No!

When someone steps out of their way to help, care for you ... it does ... not matter.  When they care enough ... to risk their life for you ... care enough to pick you up off the ground ... to save you from something horrible ... do you have to question them first to see if they are gay, black or white, yellow, green ... blue ... or if they believe in your God?

No ... why?  Because it means the world that someone could care enough to save your ass ... when they could just walk on by.

We all have to find our places in this big, old ... cruel world.  Cruel not from the world itself ... from the humans that live on it.

If people would join together ... to make it a wonderful place for all of us ... only acknowledging that we are all humans, we all feel different emotions, we all bleed red ... not judge by our colors, race, beliefs ... what do you think this world would be like?

This is as close as I will come to voicing my opinions on these topics.  This is what I believe ... and I know you will respect my opinions ... just as I do yours.

Confederate flags ... ISIS ... Lesbian and Gay ... Color ... Race ... these things aren't things for me to argue over.

Confederate flags are a part whether it be good or bad ... of our history.  It's how one perceives it ... lets it control how they feel.  Not all of history is pleasant ... men had to fight wars a lot of them didn't want to ... had to.  Men treated people bad ... used them in every way possible.

History isn't all good ... ever so often it seems everyone jumps on a bandwagon to pretend something didn't happen ... they tried to make things disappear ... We are finding out things such as this now ... history as taught to us isn't all ... how it really was.

Lesbian and Gay ... they have the right to be in this world just as 'straight' people.  They can't just up and die because ... you ... want them to.  Do I have to die because ... you don't like me?

Does it mean I don't have a place in this world because you hate me?  Like everyone else ... I'm going to find me a place, hold that ground.  Wouldn't it be sad to kill everyone, everything we hate?  You would be killing your family members, friends, innocent people.

I am straight, married. I only know that the Confederate flag is a part of our history ... all the good or bad about it.  I don't want to hurt someone over their beliefs.

That flag is there from the past ... you can't erase it.  Teach about both good, bad so ... it can't happen again.  It isn't worth killing someone over.  You can't sweep all the bad stuff under a rug ... pretend it didn't happen.  You learn lessons from it all ... what's important is how you go from there.  Make good from bad.

Of course, what just happened ... oh my.  It's awful for someone to go into a church where he was accepted ... sit there there, then do what that guy did.  He killed people who contributed more to life than he thought to do.  I can't even fathom what was in his mind.  The flag didn't do it ... the man did it.  He held that gun in his hand.

It broke my Heart.  Then ... everyone is devastated but, they turned around and forgave.  How amazing is that?  Suppose the whole world was like that?  Good people ... they lost so much the moment that man pulled the trigger.  A family member, a church member, people loved by many.

Color ... it's strange how we judge others by ... color.  Have you talked to people, enjoyed the conversation ... having a rapport ... and the thought 'color' didn't come to mind?

Do you see color when that person helps you ... saves your life, cares for you when you are in danger, down on your ass?  I bet you don't care what color they are when ... you need someone to help you in this mean-ass life.

I remember being a little girl ... I look back at how innocent I was.  I had a little friend whom I loved dearly.  As that little girl ... I didn't know to look at my skin, her skin ... I remember her smile, laughter, and that I loved her.  In later years looking back ... I can see in my mind ... our skin was only a different color.  I remember her as my friend ... my very first friend.

Strange how as a child ... I didn't even see color.  What would this world be like if we just accepted everyone just the way they are ... colors of all kinds ... who gives a damn what someone's sexual preference is as long as they don't flaunt it in our faces and do nasty things in public?  Straight people can sicken others by their nasty actions ... just because they are straight doesn't mean they are ... perfect.

This is as far as I will voice what I think about color ... I don't choose this war to fight.  One can see where I stand ... I hold my ground, and I feel I'm right.

I know that I see, and care about people, their feelings ... and am happy when others like me, respect my feelings, care about me.

Love is what is most important in life.  Think about it ... nothing else is as important as these things ... love, caring and helping others along your way.  Doesn't everyone believe that?  I pray that they do.

I know growing up as a little girl ... I grew up in Hell.  People loved to raise hell, hurt each other ... blackmail, set each other up to fall on their faces, spite each other ... physically fight, draw lots of blood.  This was the family I grew up in ... this was a small world.  Just think about the big world ... same thing.

We will always have ... hell raisers.  I could have been one hell of a Hellraiser.  I was taught to be one of the best ... my role models were the best ... I was taught a lot of things by watching, hearing.  The thing is ... somehow, I knew I didn't want that in my life.  I ... chose ... not to allow it in my life.

People can make choices ... and in other countries ... I don't know what they can do.  So many bad things happen ... people live in Hell everyday.  I don't know what to say about that.  I can't write about what I don't know a lot about.  I know what I think.  I choose not to go there.

This is some of my thoughts on these things.  I am thinking all the time.  My Heart is so big ... I hurt for the bad things others do in the name of God ... hatred ... even their twisted way of loving to innocent people, animals.  God forgive us all ... that is the thought that comes to my mind.




Photo owned, article written and owned by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.








Wrinkled Air ... Shimmery Dragonflies, Too

Wrinkled Air ... and Shimmery Dragonflies, Too
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee




Artwork is by me, Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
Tommy ...     11-20-1969 ***5-29-2010




As I walked I could see ahead of me ... the air was clear, clean.  No pollution here.  I was looking at the trees, flowers when I noticed to my right ... the air appeared to be ... wrinkled.

Curiosity took over ... I didn't feel afraid at all.  I walked to the space where the air was wrinkled.  No one would notice it ... unless like me ... they paid close attention to their surroundings.  I'm always looking for the ... unusual.

I stood there ... I cocked my head from side to side like a little bird.  I decided to put my hand out ... explore the air.  Why not?  We never know ...

I touched the wrinkled air ... my fingers sensed more than felt ... the air shift ... open!  I felt excitement go through me like an electric current.  Oh my!

I gently wiggled my fingers ... the air opened up to me!  I didn't think twice ... I stepped through.  The wrinkled air closed behind me.  It must be meant to be!  I wondered briefly ... is this one of the portals to Heaven?  For a split second, I thought ... Hell!  I pushed that thought away as quickly as it came.

I began to walk slowly, peering ever which way.  I was trying to get a feel for the new world I had stepped into.  I walked for quite a ways ... I admired the unusual flowers of every shape, color ...  the air here was so pure, I could breathe extra-well.

Trees of every kind, shape ... were everywhere.  The pools of water were really blue! and inviting!  I walked to one, put my sandaled foot into the water ... a orange and white fish came to the surface ... smiled at me.  I didn't think anything of it ... I smiled right back at that fish!

I walked along, relaxed.  Where was I?  Was I the only one here?  I began to hear a soft humming in the distance.  It sounded like singing ... it was so beautiful I felt tears in my eyes.  I loved this place ... sounds, all my eyes could see.  I felt I was not going to leave here ... I'm staying forever.

I followed the smooth, sandy path to a bend around trees ... lo and behold ... I couldn't believe what I saw!

Angels!  Real Angels standing around ... some sang softly ... some talked to each other.  A quietness came over all as I walked closer.  They looked at me with questions in their eyes ... where did you come from?

 I smiled sweetly at them ... I found a patch of wrinkled air ... I touched it with my hand to explore the air.  It shifted, opened to let me in.  It closed behind me ... but, I know where the wrinkled air is if you want me to go.  I hope I'm not intruding ... I hoped this is Heaven ... there's someone I wish to see.  Won't you please help me?

The most beautiful angel glided over to me.  She had long, curly hair woven of gold.  Her wings were huge, lacey with white pearls, sparkling in the sunlight.  Her smile competed with the sunshine ... her teeth white as snow.  The scent around her was of the nicest smelling flowers.  I wanted to stay in her presence.

She looked into my eyes, smiled the softest smile.  I felt warm, as cosy as if I was a baby wrapped in a blanket.  I know I smiled back.

I know who you wish to see.  At that time ... little dragonflies began to appear.  Little soft green colored bodies, shimmery purple, white wings.  I lost my breath in such beauty ... knowing dragonflies ... reflected Tommy in my life.

Could this be Heaven ... could Tommy be close by?  The dragonflies flew gently around me ... their wings gently kissing my hair, my face.

A breeze began to blow ... I felt coolness on my face.  Tears were running down on my cheeks ... the coolness was from the breeze kissing my tears away.

I make gold dragonflies with gold wire, beads in memory of Tommy... I leave them in public places for people to find.  I never expect anything back from them, no strings attached ... I hope they could bring a smile, joy to someone's face, heart ... feel such as this.

I was feeling what I hoped someone could possibly feel, when finding one of my dragonflies.  A joy, happiness inside when something unexpected, beautiful came into one's life ... no matter how little, big.  The unexpected ... the meant to be to let someone know they're not alone in a special way.

I sensed something changing around me ... I looked around.  I saw a tall angel approaching me.  My breath caught in my throat ... he had strawberry blonde hair.  As he came closer ... I saw his blue-green eyes ... the colors on the dragonflies.  Tommy!  I began to cry silently ... that's my son ... that's Tommy walking toward me.

Here in a world away ... only wrinkled air kept us apart.  Somehow, I managed to find the portal to Heaven ... find my only child.  Tommy!

The tall angel glided toward me with a big grin on his face.  Yes, that's that Tommy grin ... sparkling up into his eyes!  No one can smile a Tommy smile quite like my son.

I recognized a feeling I had forgotten ... the pride of being a mother ... a part of me ... smiling back at me.  Someone who meant the world to me ... knew would always be there.  Tommy!

Everything was so quiet ... I whispered to my son ... I'm so glad to see you ... I looked everywhere for you.  Mama, I missed you, too ... he said.  He hugged me with his son hug!  I hugged him back as a mother would!  Mother and son stood there ... one a mere mortal ... the other an angel.

We walked over to a white bench, sat among the dragonflies and flowers of many colors.  We talked forever it seemed, when Tommy stood up, said to me ... Mama, it's time for you to go ... it's not time for you to be here.  You have to go back, find the wrinkled air ... go back to your life ... this is my life, here.

I was so happy to see my child, know how it felt to be a mother again that I didn't even cry.  I hugged him happily, turned knowing it was time for me to walk away.  I didn't even look back because I knew everything was all right.

I walked the smooth, sandy path back with pure happiness in my Heart.  I didn't mind going back to my life.  This was Tommy's life here.  I approached the wrinkled air, turned around to look behind me ... smiled.  I knew I'd find the wrinkled air later in time ... I would come back to visit again.

My hand reached out to the wrinkled air ... sensed the air shifting.  I moved the air back, stepped outside into my world.  I held the invisible portal open for a moment ... looked back inside.

Strange how the clear air held two worlds side by side ... one we live in, one that was Heaven.  Strange also, when in Heaven we can look outside into the world ... in our world we look at Heaven everyday ... and never know it.

If I hadn't been looking ... I would have never known I could visit Heaven ... through the wrinkled air.



Note by this Author:

I was thinking about cellophane wrapping ... seeing through it while wrinkled.  I thought about the world we live in being on one side of the clear wrapping ... and you couldn't see to the other side ... being Heaven.


Wrinkled air ... mixed with imagination became wrinkled air with shimmery dragonflies.  I have just after a very long time ... decided on which dragonfly I want as a tattoo on my right shoulder in memory of Tommy ... a soft green body, shimmery purple, white wings ... 3D.  I will get it done in the near future.


When walking on the other side of it ... you are in Heaven ... our loved ones who have gone there ... can look through the 'wrinkled air' ... see us.  They can send us signs when we are grieving for them.


Dragonflies have a knack of being around lots of times when I am thinking of Tommy.  They do little strange, unusual things from time to time.  That's my Tommy sign from Heaven.  What is yours?


Photos/story both are owned, written by me.  Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee



Thursday, June 25, 2015

Which Dragonfly in Memory of Tommy?

Tattoo Artist ... Perfect Dragonfly ... are now Decided On
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee








I know now ... which dragonfly I want.  I've had a hard time between two dragonflies a friend sent to me off Pinterest.  Oh, both are ... perfect.

I chose the solid color dragonfly that is purple.  I decided on that one until ... I kept being pulled back to the dragonfly that has a soft 'green' body, and the wings are soft colors, including soft purple. The dragonfly on the ... left.

Purple and green are colors that are my good luck colors.  I want the dragonfly to be those colors.  The photo on the left is the dragonfly I chose ... it was a very difficult decision.

I wonder if you will agree with me on my choice.  I would be happy to hear your thoughts on this.  Which one would you pick?  The one on the left ... or the one on the right?

I have decided also, who to get to do the tattoo.  When it's time, I will share it in photos.

Jason Wilkins at Dystinkd Tattoos on ... 215 S. Bickett Blvd, Louisburg, NC  919-265-7353 ... is who I chose out of two tattoo artists.  

Oh ... not only are tattoos done there ... he has people who do piercings, permanent makeup and such. If you go there, just mention Gloria/Granny Gee and the dragonfly.

I've been following Jason's work online, listening to others who got their tattoos  ... for quite some time.  I'm impressed by his shop ... it's sterile like a doctor's office ... I have noticed he takes such pride in his shop.  He encourages people to be careful when they go for a tattoo. It made a very good impression on me.

See, I've never been in a tattoo shop ... I only heard about them!  Jason's shop has a good reputation.

I'm excited now, that I know which dragonfly I want ... without a doubt.  I'm excited I have chosen the tattoo artist I want now ... without a doubt.

Okay ... why is doing all this to get a little dragonfly so important?  Because it's going to be my dragonfly ... in memory of my son, Tommy ... who died May 29, 2010.  It has deep meaning to me ... it has to be ... right.

This is the second 'major' decision I've taken such a long time in deciding on, in two months.  I feel both decisions are positive, good for me.

It will be a few weeks before I get it done, when we have extra money.  Skip wants to get it done for me ... I have to know that it's time to get it done.  I will know when it's time.

I hope you'll take a moment to let me know what you think ... do you like the dragonfly on the left best ... or on the right ... best?  Thank you.




Note by this Author:


The dragonflies were found on Pinterest ... a friend sent them to me.  I'm not certain who the tattoos artists are ... this is the only information I have:

...  'realistic purple dragonfly tattoo - Incredible work by talented tattooist Tan Yılmaz ... for the solid purple dragonfly on right at top.

...  www.anabi-tattoo.com  for the dragonfly with green body( on the left at top).







Don't Even Try It!

Don't Even Try It ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny




Photo is of how I had porch arranged in past ... photo is owned by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates




They wondered why they never got company anymore.  Ever since they got that new security system installed ... everyone quit coming to see them.  I wondered why, too?

I'm curious by nature when something seems to be strange ... I want to know what's going on.

I asked them what time did company usually come ... they said around 7:00, 8:00 pm in the evenings.  I decided I would pop up around 7:30 pm.

I drove into the driveway, thought for a moment I saw something move near the porch.  I got out, began walking up the sidewalk toward the porch, when ...

When a huge 7 foot tall man stepped out in front of me ... I wondered who he was.  I saw an emblem on his shirt.  Alas, he was too tall for me to read it.

I began to go around him ... he put his hand on me, forcing me to stop.  I looked up at him, asked him who he was to stop me from seeing my friends.  He didn't answer.  He let go of my shoulder.

I began to walk forward once again ... his voice boomed out at me, "don't even try it"!  I stopped in shock, looked at him closely.  Is this why everyone stopped coming to visit my friends?

I took several more steps ... I woke up on the ground.  The big man was gone ... I was ready to be gone too!

I waited until the next day to tell my friends that I knew why no one came to see them anymore.  Not only was their new security system protecting them from robbers breaking in ... they were protecting them from their friends dropping by also!

Needless to say, they called the security company to come out to uninstall the system.

That evening I drove up to test it out.  My heart was in my throat as I got out of my car.  I began to walk hesitantly toward their home ... I was afraid the big man would loom up in front of me again.  He might kill me this time!

I made it to the door, pressed the bell.  My friends opened the door, greeted me with a smile.  All had returned to normal.  :)


Note by this Author:

This is fictional ... I watched the commercial on tv where the big man told the robbers 'don't even try it'.  He was representing the security system being advertised.  My thought was suppose ... it went on the blink ... stopped both friend, and foe from coming to their house?

Photo/fiction story both owned, written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Hope Someone Has Compassion For You

Hope Someone Has Compassion For You
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter























Photo is of me after Tommy, my only child died.  This is one of
the faces of grief ... I looked like Hell ... I was in Hell ... let your
child die ... you will know what I mean.

Be kind to people when
they are in grief, pain ... they will remember you when they 'snap'
back to being themselves.  I am remembering things ... now.  Did
you think I didn't feel, hear you when grieving?  I didn't forget ...

I'll be watching, listening, waiting to see when in your life how you
handle the things that have happened to me.  The only difference is
that my damn Heart will feel compassion where you never did.




You sigh with relief, thank God
Thank God I'm not her
She lost her child, think ... I have mine

Some of you go smugly your way
Thinking you need never worry
You won't lose your child ... never

You fool yourself each time you do
Never knowing how fragile life is
You take for granted everything

You've never lost your child
Never lost your home, belongings
All your family due to death

You've never suffered ill health
Almost die more times than one
You know only happiness ... no tears

I am glad for you ... wish that for all
It's the way it should be ... I guess
Wonder why sometimes, it wasn't for me

I don't think I've been that bad in life
But then again ... maybe I have
Didn't know it but, somehow was

I know really bad people
Life is good for them ... only good comes their way
So, I don't think it's whether one's good or bad

Why?  Because even Santa Claus comes to see
Mean kids as well as good
They don't miss out on getting a thing

Look at how the rich and famous live
Most of them don't get there without being bad
Mistreating others ... doing wrong

How happy they are in their world
Never losing all ... nor lose a child
I've often thought about this

Should I have been bad ... instead of good
God knows I started down that path
Would I have it all now, have my child?

We'll never know because I chose to be good
Almost seduced into the world of have-all
I wonder could I have lived with myself?

I don't think so ... I don't think I'd have my child either
That's not what determines when a loved one goes
Then again ... sometimes, it is depending on circumstances

We all control our destinies ... that's true to a certain point
What's sad is that we don't get that second chance
We make decisions hoping they're the right ones

Only down the road we find we shouldn't have
We can't go back ... that bridge is burned
You have to go forward hoping to find the door

The door that opens to what we want
In life ... sometimes, we open the wrong ones
By mistakes ... how can we know when we guess?

The doors you closed to me will one day lock you out
So you can feel how it feels for someone to do you that way
You deserve it ... you know

Don't dish it out if you can't take it
Give medicine ... get your medicine too
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you

Think about what you do when you make a decision
If it'll hurt someone, close a door in their face
Because one way or other ... it'll happen back to you

You deserve it ... you know
To see how it feels when you dish Hell on others
You made your bed ... hope someone has compassion for you

You'll certainly see what Hell feels like one day
When you die ... go that way
Just hope someone has compassion for you




Note by this Author:

Just thinking, writing ... don't ask me why this poem ... it's just the way it is.

Poem/photos owned/written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Inside a Teardrop ...

Inside a Teardrop ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee


















This is the Why? of my tears.  This is the last photo taken of Tommy
only a short time before he died that day on May 29, 2010 ... at Myrtle Beach, SC.
Photo owned by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny




Tears rolled down my cheeks
Thinking about my Son again
I don't cry aloud ... only in silence

A lone teardrop fell on my hand
I looked at it through glistening eyelashes
I wondered ... what's in a tear?

I touched the teardrop with my finger
It divided itself on my skin
I looked closer

One tear made two teardrops
I wanted to see what was in a teardrop
Does it show my pain ... grief, sadness?

I pressed one of the teardrops
Making it ... divide itself into two more teardrops
I looked closer

No, I couldn't see anything in the teardrops
Only the pure, clear drop of ... water
I could taste the saltiness of one tear

I just couldn't see anything in the teardrop
To define ... why? ... it fell
No one can look at a teardrop to see why? someone cried it

I know, I tried ... I couldn't see the pain, grief, sadness
That made the teardrop fall ... something powerful there
Something I couldn't see ... only feel

Emotions of grief, sadness ... pain ... made the tears form
But how?  Looking inside the teardrop
I could not see ... I press the teardrop flat

It made my skin wet ... I still couldn't see
Anything to show me why? the teardrop fell
I wiped it off my skin ... nothing left

Looking inside my teardrop I couldn't see a thing
Dividing it with my finger I still couldn't see
Drying it away ... there was nothing left

What made the teardrop fall
Was it the feelings inside my Heart
So heavy, full ... spilling over like a dam?

Spilling over in the shape of tears
Typed by my fingers into words
This is my finding of what's inside a teardrop

A teardrop is invisible pain
Invisible happiness ... you can't tell
Until you look at the expression on one's face

If you see pain in the eyes ...
Happiness glowing from a smile
You instantly know why? the teardrop formed

Sometimes, you still can't tell
In my eyes ... you might see pain turn into a smile
To make you feel better ... not sad

Think about that next time you see a teardrop fall
Divide it and see if you can see why? it formed
Like me, you'll know emotions cause teardrops to form

Because you can't see anything at all in the tear
Touch it ... you still can't tell
Feel in your Heart ... you'll know why it fell



Note by this Author:  Photos/poem owned ... written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.

I cried a few teardrops this morning ... I became curious to see if I could see my pain, grief in one ... I tried to describe it.  Gloria

That's Why You See me Smile ... if You See me Cry

That's Why You See me Smile ... if You See me Cry
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee



Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee (Tommy named me Granny Gee before he died ... I'm not a Granny Gee in my life) ...




Tears are just beneath the surface
Much closer than even I thought
Doesn't take much for them to spill over

Example ... a friend sent me a special poem
About a loved one who is gone
She said don't you cry, this is beautiful

I knew I wouldn't cry, and read
It was beautiful I thought
I felt something wet on my cheeks

I was crying when I didn't know
Didn't know there were tears still left
I felt heaviness in my Heart

I realized I will never stop crying
I will never stop grieving
Because I'll never stop missing you

Love is that way ... there will always be a sadness
In my Heart because you are gone
Meaning you were important, special in my life

I miss you, Son ... it still hurts so bad
It's easier now to push the grief back in
Like putting the stuffing back into a pillow

It spills out of a hole that one has to mend
I push it back in ... put a few stitches in
They are never too tight so, I can still feel

Feel the grief ... love in my Heart
For my son who has gone away
Grief can be healthy, good

Depending on how we want to handle it
I chose to make my grief as good as possible
That's why you see me smile ... if you see me cry



Note by this author:

Thank you, Diane MacKay ... you inspired this poem by sharing that beautiful, Heart-touching poem.  It touched my Heart ... in the deepest way.

Photos/poem are owned/written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee