Saturday, March 4, 2017

My Facebook Post This Morning

PUPS THREE ... UPDATE ON MY GASTRIC SLEEVE JOURNEY




I was lost in the space of the big shirt you now see on my body. By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee





Pups are fed breakfast ... I told Duke to get back into his cozy kennel cab with warm blankets ... he ran back and I reached in through the flap ... gave him his Oinkie to chew. He's so happy! I rolled his curtains up to let the sunshine kiss Duke's space warm today.<3








Kissy and Camie are in chew heaven this morning with their Oinkies. Both are laying near Skip so he can't move without them knowing it! <3








Yesterday a friend highlighted my hair! I PURE LOVE it! It's been a while since I've had that done. The Pups come first.


I looked in the mirror and smiled at myself this morning ... it feels so good to 'look like ME' again ... I've been looking so long. I'm thankful to have peace inside. Sometimes I feel Tommy is smiling at me ... before ... I couldn't feel that for seeing only my tears. <3


I feel he'd be proud of me today if he saw me <3 Sometimes I feel the most overwhelming sadness that Tommy is gone. I know this is normal. I miss him with my very Heart.


Once in a while I feel what I call 'the flutter of wings' in my stomach ... what I mean when I say that is like when birds are trapped in a cage and they panic to get out of the cage ... their wings begin to beat harder, harder to get out ... and begin to feel suffocation of being trapped in a space they need to be away from. I have to stop ... take deep breaths and get my mind on other things. I just felt the twinges of that feeling ... it's time to move to another subject <3


What a beautiful day it's going to be ... I feel there are happy surprises around the corner :) Isn't that a wonderful thought!? I'm moving forward ... never going backward into that darkness again. I truly am afraid of the dark ... more so ... since Tommy is gone. I keep my eyes on the light in my life, always going toward it. :)


Happy weekend! I send Love to all my Special Friends here! You have lifted me up so many times ... My Heart is always full of Gratitude <3 <3 <3Gloria Faye Brown Bates <3 <3 <3


You can see where 'I was lost' .... look at my shirt below in the photos! I can't believe it! I wore that big shirt just to see how it felt ... the sleeves are too long and you see all the 'space' around me :) <3 I don't make fun of it ... I know how it feels to 'be fat' ... I will never make fun of me being fat ... and NEVER make fun of anyone being 'fat'.


It hurts too bad when one wants to be smaller .... losing weight is the HARDEST thing one can do. I don't think I would be amiss in comparing it to quitting smoking ... quitting drinking ... quitting drugs.


Thankfully I don't have all those things to 'quit' ... the weight was enough. Don't think for one second just because you get the gastric sleeve surgery ... that you are magically going to lose all the weight while you eat .... you will never-ever do it.


I promise you from experience you ARE GOING to have to exercise, walk ... do your part. IT ISN'T THE EASY WAY OUT. Take this from someone who knows firsthand.


I can tell you that each morning when I shower ... I am PURE excited now to put my jeans on ... put a belt on. I love dressing again. The clothes I have now are getting too big but, I wear them with pride :) <3 I am trying to fill myself with all the happiness I can and guess what ... this happiness is 'free'. When I feel the sadness I know will come periodically from the loss of my son ... I want to have so much happiness inside that it will be easier to bounce back from. I mean to do that <3
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