Our Babysitter Wanted To Cut My Brother's Wiener Off ... Kill Us

Photos of ME ... my Mama ... I don't have any photos of my little brother. Photos owned by Gloria Faye Brown  ...

I sit here this morning in my little pool of sunshine

I look out the window to see inside

Memories of things both happy, painful ... sorrowful

I go through one by one as thoughts float by 

Deciding what to write about each morning

Maybe that one... oops! No, that one

This morning isn't any different ... I'm still thinking

Like you ... I never know what I will write about

I hope it will be interesting, inspirational whatever it is

The sunshine isn't as bright at the moment

Making my thoughts ... memories a little darker

When it shines brightly ... so, do I

My mind was just triggered by a dark shadow outside

I see ... I remember ... two children ... a little boy, a little girl

We were being taken care of ... only we weren't 

Her name was Helen ... a heavy set, black lady

She was nice except when drinking, waiting for her boyfriend

Then ... our little home, world became a scary place

We were locked outside when her boyfriend came

My little brother was told if he told our mama

She would cut his weiner off ... she would kill us

We tried to tell our mama, she didn't believe us

Little children make up tales to get attention

Mama, please don't let Helen come back, she is going to kill us!

Mama didn't act as if she heard us ... we were so afraid for the next day

Helen was coming back ... she'd be drinking ...mean, angry

We were in the way when her boyfriend would come

The next day came ... Helen came ... all smiles ... she was so nice

Until mama went out the door off to work ... Helen locked the door

She began walking slowly toward us ... saying she told us not to tell mama

Her eyes blazed as if on fire ... her fingers were clenching ... unclenching

She was going to cut my brother's wiener off ... she was going to kill us

I grabbed my little brother's hand, ran ... dragging him while he screamed

Into the big, white bathroom we went ... I reached up, locked the door

Helen beat on that door screaming what she was going to do to us

I remember watching the lock on the door each time she tried to bust it open

The door would shake violently, the latch would shake too

Mama! My mind called out to my mama to come save us

I knew she wouldn't hear ... she didn't believe Helen was going to kill us, cut my little brother's wiener off

I was trembling ... afraid of being killed at the same time knowing my mama

Would kill me too for daring to run from the babysitter, lock us in the bathroom

I held my little brother, he couldn't cry anymore ... we waited for the door to open

When ... all became deathly quiet for a moment ... we knew it was a trap

To make us come out ... whatever was happening on the other side of the door

Became loud ... men's voices ... mama's angry voice! She was cussing Helen!

I waited a moment deciding whether to unlock the door when I heard my mama

Saying to unlock the door ... I knew she was the one who would kill me now

I was the one who locked my brother and I in the bathroom

My hand shook so hard I had a time unlocking the door

The door came flying open ... I closed my eyes waiting to die

Arms, hands flew out to grab me ... I didn't feel any pain

I opened my eyes to see my mama's face as she held both my little brother and I

Her eyes were full of anger as tears ran down her face ... somehow I knew

I wasn't going to die that day ... the anger wasn't at me

I relaxed in my mama's arms ... she believed us after all

She had left for work as usual ... sneaking back to hear Helen screaming at us

She ran next door to call the police ... came back to confront Helen

The police came quickly as we lived in town ... they took Helen away 

Just as her boyfriend drove up wondering what the Hell was happening

My mama ran to him showing him what the devil would do if he ever came back

That was one of the few times ... just for a moment ... I felt my mama's love

Fierce, ready to fight for her children kind of love ... can you imagine how my little girl Heart felt?

My mama really loved ME! For this moment at least ... for this moment was all that mattered.