Saturday, December 31, 2011


I came down from the North Carolina mountains to visit and was spending the night with one of my aunts. She had a boyfriend who was living with her. I didn't especially like him at all. He seemed so 'seedy'.

I was glad to see my aunt, though I suspect she was jealous of me and later... I found out that she was. I'm sorry she ever distrusted me... I wouldn't have hurt her in that way. This is the aunt who beat me and left a bad scratch on my right arm... I have that scar today. I never held that against her.

The next morning she got up and asked me to ride with her to the post office. I hadn't dressed and still had on my long nightgown and said I would stay there. I noticed she hesitated to leave and later I understood.. at that time I wasn't used to her distrusting me and... didn't catch on at that time.

While she was gone I went to the kitchen and I heard her boyfriend calling me by my 'family' name. 'Fay-eee, Fay-eeee'. I didn't feel good at all listening to 'how' he was saying it, not at all.

I stayed in the kitchen and asked what did he want and he asked me to come there. He wouldn't quit calling me and I was so nervous. I walked to their bedroom door and told him I wasn't coming in there and to quit calling me! He was still in bed and was trying to get me to come there. He was so disgusting.

I went back into the kitchen to wait until my aunt came home. Fay-eeee, Fay-eeeee, Fay-eee, come here! I prayed for my aunt to hurry and come home and... my prayers were answered. She came home and I could tell she'd been worried at 'what would happen while she was gone'.

I acted as if nothing happened, never telling her about her seedy boyfriend. I couldn't hurt her.... and I hadn't done anything wrong. In my 'family'.. no matter if you do nothing wrong you will be thought of as ... if you had.

I hate for someone to call me 'Faye'..... it never bodes well at all. Never.

It means I'm either in trouble.. or someone is going to cause me trouble. I don't trust anyone who calls me 'Faye'. Only a few cousins can do that and I don't mind... I call them by family names, too.

I have alot of 'Faye' stories... eventually I will tell alot of them.


  1. It is sad that your own family members didn't trust you. Little did they know that you may have been the one person that could be trusted! I know I trusted you and never regreted it! Love,Ms. Nancy

  2. I remember you as my Faye, a childhood cousin whom I dearly loved. I know you as no other. I am sorry for the pain that you went through. It was the people, not the name. I think you are afraid to be called Faye so that you won't put your trust in people who could hurt you. Faye is a most treasured name and sacred to you.