It's a New Day ... My Thoughts are all Over the Place
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/ @grannygee
I was standing on the back porch this morning, looking off in the distance. I became aware of new leaves filling out on the trees all around me.
A happy, bright green color ... new color is here. Spring is here! I am so glad. God, I'm so glad!
Nice weather ... got to get another swimming pool ... not like the pool from Hell. Damn that boy ... he couldn't get the sand even ... said he could ... took a little-bitty level out of his pocket ... dug a little hole, stuck that level on it ... the bubble said ... even! Damn his stupid ass! He lied ... he didn't a bit more know how to level the sand in preparation for a swimming pool than there's a man in the moon. Damn pool ... threw my ass out onto the sand, after nearly drowning me!
This past winter has gotten to me more than any winter here, in North Carolina. It has been most depressing ... gloomy. I made myself be happy when the snow came, when in fact ... for the first time in my life ... I pure damn dreaded it. I pure ... damn ... dreaded it.
No more, my mind screamed. I was tired of being cooped up in the house. Tired of being boxed in with my crazy-ass thoughts. I wanted to be outside where my thoughts could take flight ... fly in freedom with the birds. I wanted fresh air in my mind, think new ... interesting thoughts.
Now ... I can take sighs of relief ... no snow in sight! I have to worry about thunderstorms, now. I have a standing plan ... when Skip's not home ... the Pups and I go to the bedroom, sit quietly until it's over. I play on my phone, or tablet. Time passes quickly.
If the weather were to get really bad ... my plan is to go to the next room in the middle of the house ... the bathroom, close the door after each Pup is inside, safely. There are rooms all around the bathroom.
Honking ... my eyes search the sky. There they are ... only two geese this time, flying over. Skip told me that geese mate for life, and if I saw one ... something probably happened to its mate. I'm so thankful those two geese have each other. Life can be lonely for people, animals alike ... if they don't have a companion.
Looking down to the pond ... the water sparkles. Green around it making it so, pretty. There might be ducks on that pond this summer. I might get to feed them. I'm a dog person, but ... I would learn how to care for baby ducks. Who knows?
There's a pond about 2 miles from here. Skip and I watch it all the time. Each time we pass it, we look for the two ducks there. One duck is white ... the other one ... black. Now, there's only one duck on the pond ... the white one.
I feel sadness in my Heart. Damn, I'm not looking at that pond any more! Something always happens to the ducks, there! I mentioned to our friend that the black duck was missing. He said he thought that duck 'sort of got squished', meaning it probably came up the little hill, got into the highway. Tears fell in my Heart for that darn duck!
I said I'm not looking at that pond again ... but, sure as the world when we drive by ... what do I do? My eyes look for the little, white lonely duck ... sometimes, it's waddling up the paved road to a house where it belongs. Sometimes, it is on the water, with its little head stuck into the water. My Heart feels for that duck. I love that darn duck! I loved the black duck!
I wonder what kind of day ... today is going to be? It's a new day ... and my thoughts are all over the place.
Colors As I Go
grief (32) only child (4) Scary (2) Boiled eggs (1) Distrust (1) Don't call me Faye (1) Dying (1) I hate to be called Faye (1) I'm afraid of the dark (1) Middle age woman (1) Pain that reaches the soul.. can't be seen (1) Running (1) Where did my youth go? (1) dying in a beautiful way (1) life is fragile (1) light on my path (1) my son (1)