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grief (32) only child (4) Scary (2) Boiled eggs (1) Distrust (1) Don't call me Faye (1) Dying (1) I hate to be called Faye (1) I'm afraid of the dark (1) Middle age woman (1) Pain that reaches the soul.. can't be seen (1) Running (1) Where did my youth go? (1) dying in a beautiful way (1) life is fragile (1) light on my path (1) my son (1)
Friday, October 26, 2012
Oh, I Know They Were Friends, 'Before'...
Oh, I Know They Were Friends, 'Before' ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
Lots of smiles, lots of friends today .... Skip and I enjoyed today being around people we think a lot of.... it seems many of them came in contact with us today... we came in contact with them today!
So many happy smiles, happy voices... like standing in front of a warm, cozy, crackling fireplace. You walk away with a glow in your heart that stays for quite some time.
I watched Skip as all his friends hugged him, patted him on the back, shoulder. My heart felt so... so like a balloon full of air/happiness... that it wanted to soar off into the blue sky all the way to the huge, fluffy white clouds I so, admired all yesterday!
How I love all of you for making Skip's day, you don't know how all of you contributed to his getting stronger. You don't know how much it meant to me to see those smiles on his face. Every person we came in contact yesterday... really touched my very heart.
Friends... a lot of Skip's friends have become my friends through time. I look forward to seeing them just like he does. They hug me just like they do him each time they see me. Amazing... I find that it means alot to me... someone who is so 'private'. :)))
Yesterday evening I was preparing a light supper when I stopped still ... felt a wonderful feeling inside my heart. I was hearing something I haven't heard for so long.... I heard Skip's voice joking, talking... I turned around to look... Skip was laughing, smiling as he was talking to me!
Do you know how long it's been since Skip felt like joking, laughing.... smiling a big smile? He's been sick, getting worse over the past months until it escalated ... to him being hospitalized, very ill.
Skip is back! Each day he becomes stronger... each day the 'fireplace burns brighter, happier'... to warm my heart, to help keep my grief for Tommy an easier load for me to carry.
My whole world is happy again. I don't have Tommy now... Skip, and our Pups make up my whole world.
During Skip's illness, I have been realizing that we have really special friends close by... then, like yesterday... not so close by.
Oh, I know they were 'friends before'........ but, during this time.... each became dearer. You know.......... each log placed on the fireplace... makes the fire more cheerier, happier, cozier... warmer. One can't feel cold when around it.... not only one's body is warmed.......... their hearts are warmed, too.
'Before' I never had to worry about being alone, financial worries... Tommy was always 'there' to make sure I was alright. This is the first crisis since Tommy went away... I was so afraid.
It seems like one by one... each hurdle, obstacle was removed in unseen ways to help me stay strong, to keep forward instead of falling into a heap on the floor, not knowing which direction to go.
Each kind voice, each gesture from every person my story is about today... helped to keep me upright, to put one foot in front of the other.... and go forward to make it through. At times, I was so afraid, I felt so alone. But... now, I know down deep.... I'm not alone....
As long as I stand in front of the fireplace, my heart and soul, body will be warmed. Thank all of you for caring, letting me know all through this time. Thank you all for being there for Skip and I. I love you all. :)))
Oh... I knew you were friends 'before'... but, all became a little more than 'just friends'....
Love, Granny Gee/Gloria