Sunday, September 14, 2014

When I Love ... I Love

When I Love ... I Love
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

My son, Tommy's photo, sitting on the upholstered chest that holds the only things I have left of him.  I didn't know my Heart could be put back together again when he died ... Skip, my Hero ... and Pups ... made life worth living again.  Gloria Faye Brown Bates/ aka #Granny Gee


Afraid ... to become close to another person

Outside my private world ...

Pain ... the thought of losing yet another loved one

When for now, I only have my world I'm close to

Realizing life ... death is the way it is

You, I ... there's nothing we can do about it

Acceptance ... takes longer for some to reach

I reached it in four years after the death of my child

I had no choice in the matter

Either I accepted ... or I quit living, or ... slowly ... go crazy

Three choices I had ... I've always loved life

No matter that life has been hard for me at times

I chose to accept ... to live my life out

Why? Because, there is nothing I can do, say

To change a thing ... I can cry, scream, roll on the floor

It doesn't get me a damn thing ... I'm tired of being sad

I can be happy while ... I grieve for my son ... in a good way

He has done something ... we all have to do one day

Die ... we are born ... live life ... and whether we want to ... or not

We each are going to have to die ... no one can change this fact of life

How many times have I told myself these things in the past 4 years?

I can't remember ... I can't see back through the darkness I came through

How in the world ... did I make it back out to the light

Learn to smile again ... to feel the wind on my face?

Live life once again ... care?

How? My precious husband ... my hero ... made me strong

Strong enough to come back ... from the worse thing to happen in my life

I made it back through many 'bad' things ... this time, I wouldn't have if it hadn't been for ... him

My whole world left now ... is my husband, three Pups

Outside them ... I'm careful whom I become close to

I don't invite unwanted, extra pain

I only become ... so close ... to anyone today

I don't fool myself ... I know my Heart

It cares a lot, I just don't show it ... when I Love ... I Love

Photo/words are of, by me, owned by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka #Granny Gee

1 comment:

  1. I can understand about not getting too close to anyone else! I am the same way! I hope and pray that you and Skip will still live a long healthy life for many more years to come. I know he is your very world! He is fortunate to have you also. He would never find anyone to love him and stand by him like you do. Love, Ms. Nancy