Black Softness ...

Black Softness ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Artwork by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/ aka Granny Gee ... I did this doodle while thinking about Tommy, my son ... who died May 29, 2010 by the ocean, running ... playing with his three-year old son.  He collapsed ... no one knew he was sick.  He had two blockages to his heart at the age of 40.  I went into the soft darkness ... for almost three years.  I've learned to cope with his death ... I can be alright, now.  It was the worse thing to happen in my entire life (and many, many 'bad' things have happened) ...

　

We squeal with joy when we are surprised

Scream with pain, when a loved one is injured



Smile when our loved one walks into a room

Cry when they have to go away



We become frightened if something happens

Until we know all is right, we calm down



Become numbed by shock when bad happens

Live in darkness, a blanket of protection



To hide us until we become strong once again

Black softness ... what would we do without it



I've lived in black softness all around me

Blocking out the pain ... knowledge my son was dead



Only if I tried to come out to the light, did I feel

Grief, pain until I could run to darkness for safety



Safety for my sanity ... I would surely go crazy

I didn't have to see, feel, hear in darkness



I guess I could describe darkness as being as close to death

As I could get ... I didn't know there was life ... anywhere



Grief ... should be part of my name ... I know it so well

Grief, shock, pain have been so much a part of my life



The strange thing is ... no matter how bad something is

I still believe ... everything's going to be alright



If I didn't believe, I would have stayed under the blanket

Of ... black softness

　



Poem is written, owned by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Photo is owned by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/ aka Granny Gee