Sitting here on my bed, monitoring my little world. Awake for several hours, couldn't sleep.
Skip seems to be having a restless sleep ... I reach over, gently touch his arm ... tell him everything is alright. He quietens down, breathes softly.
Sometimes ... Skip has nightmares. I wonder why? He dreams of people who are dead, gone ... driving his big truck, wrecking ... things we dream about that don't make sense.
The truth is ... Skip worries about dying. I understand so well. You naturally do that the older you get.
We have been through so many medical 'Life-Death' situations ... we know just how fragile Life is.
We aren't the only ones ... everyone experiences these feelings at one time or other. That's the way Life is when ... we are human.
I periodically think about my own mortality ... it isn't a pleasant thought. But ... you know ME ... I make myself face scary things ... head-on.
I make myself feel, see things in my mind that I read, see, hear ... others go through.
I sometimes, feel too deeply down deep in my very soul ... the unimaginable pain, grief ... others feel.
I am 'walking in their shoes mentally' ... unless I've already traveled on that Life's road to personally know.
I try so hard to know what others go through ... why in the world would I do that?
I'm thinking I care too much ... most people never look back seeing, knowing, feeling damage they caused in the wake of their path. People fall aside ...
Here I am ... I'm already mentally ahead seeing the pain, grief such an action would cause.
When I drop pieces of Life in another person's path ... I hope they are only the pieces of a puzzle needed to help along the way.
I hope I'm a good piece of their Life's puzzle when I touch their Life in any way.
I'm not letting negative thoughts keep ME down ... no longer than it takes for ME to do battle in my mind ... win ... let go. I will fight it to Hell in my mind until ... it ceases to bother, upset ME.
I am not going to dwell on things that are counter-productive in my Life. I don't have time to ... living real Life is plenty to dwell on. Don't you agree?
Mr. Kissy Fairchild is snuggled tight to ME, his head resting on my foot. I reach out to pet him ... his coat is silky, smooth. He stretches, looks at ME, goes back to sleep.
I have been thinking of many things while awake. No one thing in particular ... random thoughts about this ... that. Can you tell?
You know how you do as you scroll online ... your thoughts at each photo, posts flickers by ... just plain, old random thoughts ... just about this ... that.
That's what I do when I can't sleep ... I go online with expectations of finding, learning something new. That ... to ME ... is exciting ... finding something of value to store in my mind.
I can't explain the wonderful, giddy feeling I have when I see something ... learn something I didn't know. Knowledge!
I can't describe the wonderful feeling when I become aware, open my eyes ... really see something in a totally new light!
Are you like this? I don't take anything for granted ... for face value.
I don't accept something being one way when ... through time ... I have found everything, everyone ... holds a wonderful secret or ... sadly ... a dark secret.
Because ... suppose I looked at something only one way never seeing past ... I wouldn't ever know what it's capable of.
I look for the good things in Life ... people. If I happen to see bad ... I go on looking for good ... their bad things are theirs, not mine. They aren't any of my business ... who am I to judge?
I am old enough to know not to judge because Life has tripped them up somewhere in their Life. It doesn't define them ... not if it taught them valuable Life lessons.
Sadly ... sometimes, before good things can happen ... bad has to happen.
I walk around something, people ... in my mind looking for the potential to be other than what I am seeing, hearing. I study people, things ... no one ever knows. Why?
I see a car ... I walk away not knowing all the wonderful things a car can bring into my Life. Suppose I didn't know I could travel places in this wonderful machine? That's why.
Suppose ... I only saw one thing about something never realizing... its full potential? Suppose ... you didn't know all the wonderful things your phone, computer can do? See?
Truthfully ... I don't feel we ever know the full potential of anything, anyone ... we see ... but, we don't.
Like eating rice with salt, pepper, butter (or salt, pepper, gravy with meat) ... not knowing you can eat it with sugar, butter and milk. I love it both ways!
I'm glad I know. I wish to know all the ways it can be prepared, eaten.
I want know how each, everything can be used ... I want to know how ... what makes something ... tick?
I am smiling knowing no one can possibly know everything!
That's good because that leaves a 'million' things to learn! That means ... for one's whole Life ... they'll never give out of things to learn!
To ME... it's like tying a scarf ... oh my, you can tie that one scarf many beautiful, wonderful ways!
I try to see so, I don't miss out on the special, wonderful things in Life. I want to see, know.
Open your eyes today if only for a moment ... look at something you've taken for granted ... see something you didn't know, realize.
Be prepared ... opening your eyes might open you up to a new world. Don't just look ... 'see'!
