By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
Gloria Faye Brown Bates and her Son, Tommy...
(I'm fortunate to have this photo... it survived a housefire)
I become aware of myself from time to time
As I go about doing my daily things
The other times, I'm in a trance
I don't think about things at all
When I become aware of my thoughts
I catch myself standing... my eyes half-closed
My head tilted to the side, my ears
Trying to hear sounds from the past
Anyone watching would see a woman
In deep, deep thought
What she's seeing, no one else can see
She's in her own mind... she's in the past
A little smile plays on her full lips
Her eyes soften... diamond teardrops fill them
In her mind, she sees a tall, gentle giant
Who is smiling back at her
He walks toward her, holds out his arms
I love you, Mama... I miss you, too
She closes her eyes as the ghost of her son
Hugs her tightly, she hugs the... air back
Anyone watching would see a woman
With arms reaching out as if to hold someone
Tears streaming down her cheeks
She seemed to be hugging someone, but... it was... herself
Anyone watching would see her lips move
Hear her say... I love you, too... Son
I miss you with my very Heart
Please don't go, stay here for a while
I have so much to tell you, I have a lot to say
You have to go... you can't stay but, a moment?
Please come back as soon as you can
I'll always watch out for you, I love you, Son!
Anyone watching would see a woman standing
Standing, watching something they can't see
Hear her speak, listen to someone they can't hear
See a woman crying her Heart out, sobbing... please don't go!
I go about my daily things, my eyes burn
I think about my precious Son...
I'm ... inside myself ... looking inward
I'm trying to enter the past
Try as hard as I can... I can't find the way
I mentally feel with my hands, trying to part the way
I look past things that try to attract my attention
I don't want to think about this... that... I want to enter the past
I want to go see my Son... back when he walked, talked
I want to hear the sound of his voice, his laughter
Hear some of his funny jokes
Reach out to hug him tightly... kiss him on the cheek
Anyone watching would see a woman standing there
Many expressions pass on her face
While she stood there, unaware
Of herself.... as she came back ... to herself
I felt a bittersweet smile on my lips
My cheeks felt wet as I reached up to touch them
I became aware that I was crying silently
Anyone watching would hear me say... I miss you, Son
Anyone watching would see a sad woman's face
Quickly turn into a bright smile when she saw them
Anyone watching would hear her say... I was sad for a moment
But now... everything's going to be alright
People would be surprised at what some of us can see that they can't see or hear! You keep seeing and hearing Tommy and I will do the same with my loved ones too! Love, Ms. Nancy
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