November 2018 ... I have finally ... at last found the person I've looked for the past 8 years in my mirror ... Me.
I have had to put my pieces back together again ... shape, mold the blob of life I had become into the person you see today. This has been another hard journey in my life. My goal is in sight.
You can see by some of my clothes they are too big. The other day I was sweeping and my jeans almost slid off my body ... I laughed. What a wonderful feeling!
I am on the Weight Loss Journey road in Life at present. I will complete it as I made peace on my Grieving Mother Journey road.
Has it been easy ... any of it? Oh my, no. It truly all has been pure Hell. I am still standing with my feet planted on the ground ... like the Redwood tree I speak of.
I've weathered many storms with many scars that can be seen and unseen. I have cried so many tears ... like sparkling diamonds ... pure grief, pain. A grieving mother ... I lost my son May 29, 2010.
The photos at the bottom are where I had to begin ... I had turned into a big blob of pitiful life living in darkness where no one could see. I wasn't aware of myself to know I'd changed so much ... I wouldn't have cared.
I don't apologize for my awful photos just after my son died ... they are my measuring stick for how far I have come today. Not only that ... I have compassion for the pitiful woman in those photos ... I know her and her journey.
Today, you can see what peace looks like. It didn't happen overnight ... I had to want it and want to live Life again ... I had to work hard on me to get it. I didn't know that I would. I did.
Note by Author:
Photos/story are owned by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.
Photos of pure, awful grief existing in a world I couldn't see, nor care about. My mind was turned inward grieving ... trying to live with the knowledge that was bigger than I ... that my only child was dead ... my son was gone ... my son died. Have you ever stuffed a suitcase so full with more things than it could hold? I couldn't take anything out of my mind ... I couldn't walk away from it ... I couldn't live with something so huge, big. My Heart today looks at these photos I didn't remember being taken ... I feel compassion, caring for the lady below. I don't make fun of her ... I know her journey personally. I don't apologize for these photos either.
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