Sunday, May 13, 2012

I'M NEITHER A WRITER OR POET...

I'M NEITHER A WRITER OR POET...

BY GLORIA FAYE BROWN BATES/ aka GRANNY GEE

As I sit here and search for the right words

to write about thoughts, things on my mind

I realize I'm neither a poet, or a writer

I am a real person with real thoughts

It doesn't matter because once my words are written

They validate my thoughts, feelings to make me real

Once you read my words, I become a writer

A poet, depending on what is read in my written words

Be it good or bad, remember my words are my own

From my heart, experiences in my Granny Gee/Gloria life

Solely mine that I write about, my thoughts, everything

I don't claim to be other than who I am

I don't try to pretend to be other than I am

My only excuse is the love for beautiful words

Even the dark words because they express

Colorful thoughts, sad thoughts, words are color

Read in colors my thoughts, feelings

All I think, feel in this life has to do with color

Without color, I am not alive, I'm not real

I become nothing, you can't see me because I'm gray

Gray to me can be both beautiful, sad

I love to wear gray and pink, gray can be elegant

Though I've said that, I know that if I see that 'soft, velvety gray'

I don't like that, to me it's reflects death close by making me afraid

I try hard to stay close to the colors of life

Especially the colors of golden yellow sunshine, blue skies

Green grass... colors that comfort, warm my heart

I'm afraid of a world where I can't see colors

I've been to the world that has no colors many times

It's a dark world you can't see anything

A scary world devoid of even dark colors, it's so dark

My soul is afraid for my life, I fight hard to come back

To my world with colors of all kinds which are my life stories

I am writing about them... I haven't begun to write yet

Though I have, this is but, a fraction

Of what the colors of my life are

Words, colors of all kinds

Words can be anything we want them to be

They can be happy, sad, mean, ugly, good

Depending on how we want to use them

I hope as I sit here and struggle writing words

That I reflect the real me inside as I do

The goodness, kindness in my heart

Though not always do I appear to be

Pain, grief stare out at you, if you didn't know it

You would think I'm nothing, I look like nothing now

I'm trying to recapture things to make me smile, laugh again

So, I can enjoy sitting here writing my words, colors of my life

The death of my son, my only child

Took so much from from me, Gloria/Granny Gee

It sucked my world of colors almost away

Now... I'm just beginning to find them again through words

Sometimes I sit here and struggle with my words

Most of the times they are overflowing out

Like water rushing from a dam, my colors want to shine

Now that I'm back from the darkest of worlds I've ever known

I'm back now, everything is going to be alright

I realize my words will reflect dark colors sometimes

As well, as my words will reflect happy, wonderful

Colors of my life...Granny Gee/Gloria... yes, that's ... me

:)))

2 comments:

  1. I think today was a sad day for a lot of mothers. There are many mothers who had a wonderful day but there are mothers that didn't because their only child have been taken from them and are not here to share this day with them. You keep fighting and keep writing! You write so beautifully! Sometimes you are dark colors but there are times when your colors are so bright and colorful. That is what makes your writing unique! I never know what is going to be there on your blog and it is nice to look forward to see "which color" you are each day! Love, Ms. Nancy

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    Replies
    1. Ms Nancy, I can only say I am honored. I loved the way you put your words together to tell me this. Love, Gloria/Granny Gee

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