Fakey Smile Better Than no Smile ...

Fakey Smile Better Than no Smile ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

This is the first brace put on my leg at the hospital on October 3rd.  I had to be in a wheelchair ... this is at the Emergency Room.







I got to feel what I know some people must feel when they have been injured ... and need to still get around the best way they can.


I slipped, fell on October 3, 2015.  Since ... I have been wearing a brace, been on crutches ... and when at a store ... ride in the electric shopping cart.


The pain, suffering has been great.  Getting in, out of our vehicle has been very hard.  No one hears, sees me cry from the pain when I try to lift my leg up to get all of me in the vehicle.  I would smile if I saw someone ... I wouldn't let them see the pain I was feeling.


Every night is full of pain ... when in bed.  Trying to turn over ... having to sit up first ... then, maneuver into place.  Walking anywhere in the house is a struggle.


Having to keep an awkward, sometimes ... painful brace on isn't fun.  Having the brace to slip down, and the plastic buckle digging into the top of one's foot is awful, when out somewhere trying to get around.  It isn't easy to readjust the fittings when out ... it isn't that easy at home.


Losing the freedom to get about is ... just ... I am going to speak the truth for-real ... losing the freedom to get about is pure ... Hell.  On top of other health conditions ... it's been truly awful.


Now ... having said all of this ... mind you, I'm not complaining at all.  I am stating only a little of ... how it feels.


I had looked forward to my favorite time of the whole year ... Fall-time.  I had looked forward to wearing my boots with jeans, sweaters.  I looked forward to going to several Fall Festivals, to the State Fair.  If I do go ... it won't be easy.


I'm sad because now, I can't walk far ... I have to walk very easy, slowly.  I am beginning to move without the crutches some.  I still get off-balance.  I have to move slowly ... I have to go down our steps ... backwards.


In this experience so far ... one thing stands out to me that bothers me.  I saw a woman I always thought the world of ... she always seemed to think a lot of me ( these are those 'friends' I spoke of ) ... at Walmart when I had to go pick up medicine.


Skip wasn't here to be with me.  I had to ride in the electric shopping cart to move about in the store.  I saw the woman ... I saw her see me ... avert her eyes, not look at me.  I thought it strange ... usually when someone likes you ... they will run up, ask what happened.  She ignored me.  Friend?  I've known her since being a child.


Later, when I went outside walking on my crutches ... I saw her again.  She was near by ... she just looked at me ... kept walking.  She looked at me that time.  No smile like I was accustomed to seeing from her.  A fakey smile would have been better than ... no smile.






Note by this Author:


Photos, true story owned/written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Gloria Bates.

I know I won't speak to that woman again unless she ever comes up to me.  Then, I will smile a ... fakey smile while pretending I still like her.  Before ... my smiles were genuine.  Now ... not.

I never forget ... I forgive ... I just never forget.

The good thing is that this too ... will pass.  I look forward to looking ... back on this.

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Friends are the People You Add to Your Family

Friends are People You Add to Your Family ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

If only he would do this ... or do that.  I know she is a good person, but ... she won't do right.  I wonder why this, I wonder why that.


Does it matter when it comes to having friends?  Does it really matter if they do 'like you want them to do or ... not'?  I mean, think about it.  Does it?


I know we sometimes, get frustrated because our friends keep making the same old mistakes ... do the same old things.  Damn, won't they ever learn?


You worry about them ... sometimes, you feel angry at them because 'they done gone and done it again'!  Then you think ... well, if they don't learn from the past ... they deserve it.  Then ... you go back to worrying about them.


Why do you worry?  Why do you care?  Because real friends aren't easy to come by.  When you have real friends, you truly treasure them.  Not only that, you want the very best for them so, you don't have to worry about them.


Have you ever stopped to think ... they worry about you, too?  They wonder ... why ... you make the same old mistakes.  They wonder ... if you will ever learn from past mistakes.


Why in the world are you friends to begin with?  Because ... friends accept each other just as they are ... love them.  There's something about them that endears them to your Heart.


Doesn't matter what they look like ... how they dress.  Doesn't matter if their way of talking isn't polished ... or they say cuss words every other word.  What matters is ... you know you care about them and ... the feeling is mutual.  That's having a real friend.


You don't pick a friend to only want to change them later.  Friends are special ... only that one person can be the person they are.  Real friends are rare.  If you made yourself look at 'all your friends' ... really made yourself open your eyes ... you would know I'm telling the truth.


I can look back through time at the 'friends' I had.  I remember 'pure loving them' only to find out that they wanted everything I had ... including my home, husband, child.  They didn't care about me ... but damn!  they did a good job of convincing me.  Being young, naive didn't help.


I promise I learned my lessons each time they 'bit me in the ass'.  Once in a while ... I did have to repeat to learn ... it wasn't pleasant. Life can sure be painful ... in my life ... so much of the time.


I would love for my life to be pleasant the rest of my days ... for many years.  I would just like to know how it felt to have only happiness without so much grief, pain.  Many people do ... only once in a while they have to cope with painful things.


Friends ... real friends ... I have less than the fingers on one hand.  I treasure them.  I hope they are as real as I am.  I don't have friends for the sake of having friends.  I have lots of public friends online ... out and about.  I find I really care about them, but ... I don't expect them to feel the same toward me.


After all ... the only thing required to be 'public friends' is ... when you have an encounter ... you just meet, greet each other with the biggest smiles ... talk loudly at how good it is to see them.  Anyone looking would think how wonderful it is to have friends ... like that.


Well ... it is wonderful to have friends ... like that.  They mean a lot, also.  There is genuine liking a lot of the time ... but, you don't want to be around each other for long ... it gets tiresome trying to hold the smiles in places.  I know you know what I mean ... don't say you don't!


I treasure my few real friends.  I also, treasure my public friends who make me feel special.  I just try not to 'stay around for long' ... so, they can always like me ... and most important ... so, that I can always ... like them.


After all ... friends are the people you add to your family.  Since I don't have family left that I'm close to ... my friends mean the world to me.






Note by this Author:

Photo/article owned, written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

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Two Urns Sit Side by Side ... Forgotten

Two Urns Sit Side by Side ... Forgotten
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

Driving down the road in an old car
Sat two elderly people, man ... woman
Hand in hand ... singing to a melody


Eyes twinkling with pure happiness
In love as they'd been since the day they married
Soulmates, lovers, best friends for life


The man could sing along in harmony
She could sing ... but, not in tune
Didn't matter ... they were doing it together


As they did most all things
Where one usually was ... the other was close by
Some day it would all come to an end


Sometimes, they worried for the other
Sometimes ... they felt afraid
Growing old is sad ... beginning to the end


Life ... is living from birth to death
Being young ... growing old
Learning to walk to hardly walking


Young child ... old child
No one's ever lived forever
Only forever as they possibly could


They began to laugh when she sang off-key
She didn't care ... it was a joy to sing
From her very Heart ... she never missed a beat


Both rode down the road, laughing ... singing
To their heart's content
Knowing one day it all would come to an end


They would be only memories blowing in the wind
No one would miss them in this big, old world
No one was left who would care


For now, they would live as hard as they could
Enjoy life to its end ... come what may
For now, they would laugh to keep from crying


Over life they couldn't always live
When one goes, the other would be left with memories
To hold onto ... sounds of laughter, joy


Joy of living life, loving each other always
Sadness at being alone ... panic with the knowledge
Of not being able to see each other again


Tears, many tears because life can't ever be the same
Fear of being alone ... at the mercy of the world
What can the one left do ... oh what can they do?


Pray that the world will care about them
Treat them kindly, protect them until the day
The day they too, must go


Leaving behind for anyone to see
To hold in their hands
A photo, book or two ... to show they'd been here, too


No family, loved ones who cared
Who gave love while they lived
Nothing left behind to give to them


To leave in memory that they lived
No one to care ... so, they didn't care
To leave anything behind to remind them


Life is life ... death is death
It is the beginning ... the end
Ashes to ashes ... two urns sit side by side


Two urns no one cares about
Only the thought as the last one dies
Who will end up with our ashes


Will they sit on a shelf, end up in a sale
No one to treasure the remains
Of two people who lived, loved, died


The first one died knowing the other would
Keep their ashes close to their hearts
The last one died with sadness ...


No one left to care about their ashes
Wondering if their urn would be placed
Beside the other's urn ... who is going to care?


Ashes to ashes ... two urns forgotten
Sitting in a dark room, side by side
No one could see ... the loving glow surrounding them


Love after death ... one prays their urns
Would always be kept side by side
Where they belonged just as they did when living


Listen ... one can hear someone singing
Maybe it's two ... the woman's voice is out of tune
Didn't matter ... they sang in harmony


Two urns sit side by side ... forgotten
Reflecting love in the darkness
That even Death couldn't extinguish








Note by this Author:

Photo/poem written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.

Poem written as I sat ... thought about my life.  Life is really the way it is ... no more ... no less.

It's sad when a grandmother can't ever know her grandchildren ... it's sad that she can't ever leave anything to either when it's her time to go.  Life is what it is ... no more ... no less.

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His Memory ... Their Joy

His Memory ... Their Joy
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

I would like to fly with the dragonflies
Fly in the breeze with fragile wings
Land gently on a pretty flower


I would love to be a beautiful, green dragonfly
With amethyst eyes ... golden wings
So delicate ... precious ... special


I would be a living memory that I once had a son
Who loved, was fascinated by dragonflies
I know I can't be a real dragonfly


So, I remember my son in the ways I know how

By writing, and ... making golden dragonflies
With delicate gold wire, beads of color

I leave them for people to find
A little treasure in the form of the dragonfly
Praying that whose life it touches ... brings a smile


A smile of joy, happiness in their hearts
They get to keep something special
At the same time, remember Tommy

Doesn't matter if they knew Tommy or not
Just as it doesn't matter if they know I am the one
Who made the dragonfly they found to keep


What matters is someone finds a treasure to keep
Remembers why it was created
In the first place ... his memory ... and their joy

Note by this Author:

I make dragonflies of gold wire, and colored beads in memory of my son, Tommy.  I leave them 'anywhere' for someone to find.

When they pick it up to keep ... they read the attached note.  Remember Tommy ... my precious son.

They will read that I hope the dragonfly brings joy to their hearts, a smile to their face ... and that I wish special things to happen in their life.  It is theirs to keep.

Photos/poem are owned, written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

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Damn GPS Began Yelling, Calling Him Names ...

Damn GPS Began Yelling, Calling Him Names ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter







This past week Skip told me something that was amazing.  He had his GPS programmed for a town in New Jersey.  Ever so often the GPS will mess up ... for instance ... try to route him through towns, take him off the main interstate.


Well, Skip wouldn't detour off his route, and it ... pissed the GPS off!  The GPS began yelling at him to 'make a U-turn and go back'!


Usually the GPS doesn't take a 'wrong turn' or if you don't follow its directions so personally.  It normally begins to reroute itself.  This time ... the GPS was mad.  The computerized voice began screaming at Skip ... called him names.  He called it ... names!


I listened to Skip tell me what that GPS did.  I began laughing ... because when the day comes that a GPS begins to take things personal ... starts to yell, scream at me ... I'm going to stomp it into the ground.


You know Skip was joking, don't you?








Note by this Author:

Skip can come up with the darnest things to make me laugh.  We did laugh and joke about ... 'suppose a GPS really did that'!

Oh ... guess what?  We have a friend whom no one can convince him that the voice in the GPS is a computerized voice ... he thinks the voice is that of a ... real woman.  He likes the 'sexy' voice.  I can't believe anyone would believe that!

True story/photo both are owned, written by me... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.

White Duck ... Black Duck

White Duck ... Black Duck
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny @ Twitter

In the middle of the small pond
A white duck swan all alone
Wishing for companionship


One day a small black wood duck
Stopped by for a drink of water
Grew close to the duck, stayed a while


Weeks went by until the black duck
Felt the need to travel on, fly
Come fly with me, white duck!


He flew all around the white duck
To get it to fly ... the white duck tried
To no avail ... sadly the duck dropped its head


I can't fly with you, I wish to go
I'm not the flying kind of duck
I can only fly short distances, not high from the ground


The black duck knew he had to go
He had to leave his beautiful friend behind
With grief in his heart ... he flew off


Promising to come back one day
The white duck swan sadly
On the pond until one day


The black duck flew down from the sky
Landed on the water just beside
The white duck as it looked up in surprise


I'm back, white duck
I'll stay long as I can ... I don't want to go
Leave you behind ever again


Everywhere the white duck went
The black duck followed like a shadow
Always by its side


Where you saw one, there was the other
As close as two ducks could be
White duck, black duck were in love


They swan on the pond each day
Happily ever after
Contented as only ducks can be!







Note by this Author:


Skip and I watch a pond we pass by often.  A white duck lives on the pond ... and for a time a black duck came ... always sitting close to the white duck like its shadow.  It was smaller than the white duck.


We were so happy the white duck had companionship.  Skip and I didn't have to worry the white duck was lonely anymore until .... one day not long ago ... the black duck was gone.


Now, the white duck swims all alone in the little pond.  We see birds stop by to visit, and an egret or two.  We worry about the white duck.  We can't help but, to.


We wish the black duck would come back.  I thought it would stay there always ... Skip said that both ducks ... weren't the same kind of ducks.  The black duck could fly great distances ... the white duck can't.


I don't know the differences between one duck or the other ... my prayer is that the black duck will come back ... or someone get a companion for the sweet, white duck.


Poem/photo ... both owned, written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

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I Want My Last Breath to Exhale Love

I Want My Last Breath to Exhale Love
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

True love never dies
It becomes the air we breathe
The air we exhale


Becomes a gift once we become aware
To hold close to our Hearts
As we love others in our world


Love is like a never-ending river
As it's shared throughout life
Until the last breath, it's exhaled


Surrounding others in its warmth
Warming those who care to feel it
Becomes a part of life that's left


The world will never rid itself of love
It's here to stay in Hearts of others
To be shared in generations to come


Sadly, not everyone will feel love
Instead, hatred is shared through time
With most every person infected by it


Hopefully, more love fills the air
Than hatred ever can
Though one wonders ... when everyone's at war


I've lived in both worlds ... love ... hate
I learned to hate as well as love
Before I knew it ... love pushed hate away


Until no hatred was left behind
Like a glass full of water
I am full ... of love


Love until the day I die
No matter what ... I won't hate
When I die, I want my last breath to exhale ... love



Note by this Author:

These words came to mind when I was thinking about the world in general ... and of course it became personal ... I thought about me, my life.

Photo, poem owned/written by me ... Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.

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Soulmates ...

Soulmates ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

We speak at the same time
Saying the same thoughts aloud
Amazed as always ... we are one


Soulmates closer than close
Loving with all our Hearts
Each other until the day we die


There through thick and thin
No matter what ... where there's one
There's the other


If one hurts, the other feels pain
If one is happy, the other feels joy
So much alike yet ... different enough


Being together until the day
One takes that last breath
Closes their eyes to this world


Opens them to the other side
Sends love back to surround
The one left behind ... like a warm blanket


Keeping them warm with love
Until the day it's time for them
To draw that last breath ... come home





Note by this Author:



I was thinking of Skip and I as I wrote.  We are soulmates.  Our minds work a lot alike, we think ... speak the same things.  We laugh when we do.  If one is sad, the other is sad.  It's wonderful when we both are happy!



Photo is of Skip and I ... photo and poem owned, written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.

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We Become a Memory as We Move On ...

We Become a Memory as We Move On ...
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter

Artwork by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

On the porch sat an old woman
A smile played on her face
Her eyes were looking inward



At memories from days gone by
She was a faded rose
Once she was a rose of all roses



Looking at her now ... one could see
She had been beautiful in her time
Her soft smile used to win many a heart



Today, her smile was kind, soft
Her slender body graceful, fragile
She walked slower now



A tear fell on her cheek
Another one followed
Then ... one more



She met up with a memory
That made her sad
Soon ... she was smiling again



She rose from the swing she sat in
It was time to go inside
Tomorrow she would come back out



To sit in her swing
Play with her memories once again
As she did each day



She knew she'd be going home soon
How she knew she did not know
She knew she was ready to go



There was no longer a need for her now
In with the new ... out with the old
To make room for the young, the old must go



That night she fell asleep with a smile on her face
She went from life to death peacefully
To the other world where she was welcomed



All her loved ones greeted her with open arms
She held her arms out to embrace them
These were the memories in her mind



She sat in the swing smiling about
Now ... she had become a memory
In with the young ... out with the old



People go to make room
For others to follow in their place
We become memories as they make their own



We die so that they can live
Generation after generation
We become a memory as we move on






Note by this Author:



Poem/photo written, owned by me.  Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter.



Reality is ... one day we have to die.  We have no choice ... one day we ... become a memory.

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